best-selling and award-winning comics idiot, leggy blonde / also @nogodsnomayors
she
Joined March 2010
- Tweets105K
- Following986
- Followers56K
- Likes65.4K
Pinned Tweet
my new book is out today. it's about separatism and utopia and bodily autonomy and cults and capital and love and revolution and nature and sex and all the things we owe to each other. I'm so proud and excited for you to read it. i hope you do. simplicitybook.xyz
so i’m 41 today and i’m now officially *in* my forties. when i was younger i couldn’t imagine myself at this age at all, because i think i hoped id be dead by now. but im alive, and being a middle-aged woman is fine by me. and isn’t that nice.
mattie lubchansky retweeted
new york city dating ALERT!! if you sleep with this woman or any of her friends she will print your full name and penis size in the newspaper
i know it's an extremely trite observation but i kind of am still astonished at just how big of a world-historical loser elon musk is. it's honestly staggering.
the 12 hour libbing out period is over. it is now time to kill and eat the first elected democrat you see
dems back in power…..we need to go find the senate parliamentarian and lock him in a closet before january
mattie lubchansky retweeted
[crying while playing taps into a mushroom shaped like a trumpet]
In other election news.... former self-declared "supermayor" Tiffany Henyard is losing big in her *republican* bid for a seat on the Fulton County, Georgia board of commissioners. #WGNelection
workers at the US capitol building diligently installing those bathroom signs that are like a picture of bigfoot and an alien and it says “whatever, just wash your hands”
Befuddled, Rambling President Delivers Closing Argument Before Midterm Elections: "ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴇʟʟ. ᴅʀɪɴᴋ ꜰᴜʟʟ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴇꜱᴄᴇɴᴅ. ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏʀꜱᴇ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡʜɪᴛᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇʏᴇꜱ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴡɪᴛʜɪɴ."
the left isn't ready for me posting a fried jpg of a loser who burned his dick and balls off fighting a guy with a gay little ponytail from a pretty explicitly antifascist movie that nevertheless still kind of sucked from 25 years ago
"that wasn't on MY bingo card!" i know. the card contains only numbers, and, of course, the letters that spell "Bingo." i'm not stupid. i've been to bingo.
i think it’s fine if you want to go Running in private but doing it in public, especially in some sort of huge crowd, is just completely obscene
no Transplant Discourse but when i hear someone say "in east village" or "in upper west side" instead of "in THE east village" or "ON THE upper west side" its really testing the limits of my beautiful and welcoming and warm and open heart.