Brandon Howard

I think I may have misunderstood my boss when she told me that she loved seeing me hard at work...

Ever notice how white women over 40 can’t dance without clapping?

Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

Girl: That a banana in your pants, or you just happy to see me ;) Me: *Pulls out banana & eats in awkward silence*

Man you gotta love America,we're the only country who could have the most gold medals in the Olympics and still be the #1 country in obesity

Everyone’s middle name should be, motherfuckin ...try it doesnt it sound so great

Wearing leggings when you're shaped like Rick Ross -_-

A fat bitch served me at McDonalds earlier. She said, “Sorry about the wait”. I told her, “Don’t worry hun, you’ll lose that eventually “