Everyone is all pro ‘mental health’, until you actual live it and discover that a psychiatric diagnosis, however benign, will mean you are stripped of any credibility and will never be treated like a human being again in your healthcare.

It’s dawning on me that I’ve been coded as Munchaussen’s for the past two years, and that’s why I’ve been denied care in emergency departments for a post-operative infection. The sorts of questions they asked. The disbelief. My streptococcal serology continues to rise along with the severe pain at the prior operative site. How I could possibly have done this to myself, or want it, or want to have unstable housing and lose my career, friends, home, dating, mobility, and exist in terror and anguish, is utterly beyond me. How the hell do I fight this.

Mental health care is inherently coercive, because the claims are unfalsifiable. If something about you threatens a system, model of thinking, or individual practitioner’s sense of superiority, they can have you defamed and locked up.

Me: “The pain is 9/10 off antibiotics [my 10 is loss of consciousness]. I was spending my days bent over a cushion crying on all fours.” Dr in letter: “She has been troubled lately by some pelvic discomfort.” Bro.

People always say after someone goes, “why didn’t they ask for help?” Over the past two years, I have asked for help repeatedly. The answer, when I asked to be believed, emotionally supported, and for people to stand up for me in my medical care, was quite literally “no.” From about 75% of people. The ones who did stick around didn’t fully believe and yet couldn’t handle it when things got worse - which is exactly what I said would happen. Then they effed off. I have repeatedly stated that the problem is not me not trying hard enough. It is not that this is some great diagnostic odyssey. It is that my agency is being obstructed in my medical care. I need people to stand up for me. To quite literally intervene and say “this is not good enough.” Still, “no.” Ask for help - but not like that. Only in the way that we find palatable and which does not inconvenience us. My jaw is on the floor. I feel like an animal on the side of the road that has been left for dead.

Honest question: How do you get doctors to FUCK OFF with the psych and lifestyle bullshit. It is so psychologically harmful I can’t handle it anymore. How do you make it STOP?

Lazy, paternalistic, and incompetent.

Thanks ChatGPT

God, sitting in that hospital after my parent tried to have me sectioned (due to distress from lack of support) is playing on my mind. The horrifying realisation that everything you were saying was probably getting twisted in their heads. The Munchaussen’s screening questions, whilst I’m sitting there with literal effing disease in my abdomen that I’ve been trying to get treated for over 2 years. Not asking me any details about what in the medical situation had caused me so much distress. I explicitly flagged the issue of discrimination in my healthcare, and they said “that doesn’t happen.” I said yes it does, it’s what caused all this. I’ve worked so hard to foreground objective findings the past 2 years - all down the drain in one night. I think I’m just going to ignore them and pretend they don’t exist; and not engage with it at all. Dreading going to my GP who will be rejoicing at holding that crap in his hands.

I am struggling to understand how flying monkeys justify ignoring the scapegoat’s suffering to themselves, and perpetuating the abuse. Even when the abuser’s narrative starts falling apart at the seams. Any insights into this? What is going on in their heads?

The other night I experienced the pure horror of systems abuse by an abuser. My physical condition is deteriorating and he knows it. He has repeatedly dangled help in front of me, then manufactured a blow up or imposed more conditions on it. He’s been wearing me down for months and months. Impending homelessness, a debilitating infection now possibly in bone, and severe trauma from medical experiences (and his abuse) were not enough to trigger parental concern or kindness. Phone call. I’m crying. I say I am now begging for help. He refuses and humiliates me on the call, over and over. I’m distressed. He keeps doing it. Keeps pushing my buttons. I crack and say I can’t take anymore, I’m going to end it all. Half an hour later police are on my doorstep. Me, a 45kg woman alone in pain, who had just begged her family for help and a little kindness, with three cops in uniforms in the living room - still shaking from the conversation with my father. They ask me some questions. When we talk about the medical situation and my abuser, I begin uncontrollably shaking. I know I look mad. I’m crying and shielding myself and covering my face. I can’t control the shaking. My body does it daily. Severe PTSD. I’m taken away in a police car and sectioned. My abuser goes out to dinner at a swanky restaurant, pleased with himself.

Person with a chronic or atypical illness - how many times have you been psyched? How did you get rid of all the bullshit psych lies in your record?

The healthcare system destroys people’s lives and health by dismissing them, batting them around, sending them off to do pointless things. Every single one of my problems has been treatable but has dragged on for years before that point. YEARS. Was I living a normal life? No. I was disabled. Completely unnecessarily.