Alexander Bernås

A 9-year-old child is thinking about quitting sport..... This isn't because he doesn’t like football and this isn't because he isn't capable. Ultimately it comes down to the environment around him. I spoke to a parent this evening (actual true story) who has already had the conversation no child should need at nine: ➟ “Do you still want to play?” The reasons weren’t complicated, his own under-9's grassroots team in his own community has been transformed into a mini-academy that includes: • Teams are too big • A Team get to do everything • A Team get all the games and tournaments • A Team players include recruited academy players ➟ "What do I get Mum?" • I get to play less games • All the coaches do is shout at us • We never get to play in as much tournaments as the A Team • All they do is rub it in our faces that we're "not good enough." Add to that a coaching approach centred almost entirely on winning alongside constant instruction and noise. That's driven by the adult's ego to win above nothing else each and every week. Slowly the enjoyment as disappeared for the parent and more importantly the 9 year old child, who feels like quitting altogether. • This isn’t about ambition or lack of ambition. • It isn’t about standards. • It isn’t about pretending competition doesn’t exist. It’s about having realistic perspective of meeting the players where they're at = 9 years old (Children). At nine years old, football should be expanding confidence, not narrowing their experiences and love for the game. ⛔ When grassroots teams start mirroring elite senior environments without elite safeguards, everything shifts. ✅ To be clear, not every grassroots team operates like this. There are thousands of coaches doing remarkable work, being patient, thoughtful and child-centred. We have to open our eyes also gasp that stories like this still exist and more often than we’d like. When a nine-year-old considers leaving because of adults’ decisions, that’s not a talent problem. Grassroots football is meant to serve communities, not filtering them. Grassroots at the core especially at the foundational level more than any shouldn't be creating mini-elite structures at the expense of a child. Winning at nine proves very little, what matters is who is still playing at fourteen, who still loves it at sixteen and beyond, also who feels valued regardless of ability. When a child walks away early, we don’t just lose a player, we lose potential, belonging, and confidence that may never fully return, plus adding another statistic of children quitting sport early. The real question isn’t whether we can build competitive teams. It’s whether we’re building environments that children actually want to stay in.