benjamin kjos

“SLIDE” detergent security at Target… I assume it’s loud as you slide it so people are less likely to shoplift?

I like that after you played @JennyKDWB’s first song of the day intro during the show, the app thinks it’s actually Nelly. @daveryankdwb @falenkdwb

No dog walkers or smokers out tonight, 10:58pm @falenkdwb @JennyKDWB

Love this! @ConfabEvents #confab2022

Dear @EinsteinBros, today, someone at your Coffee & Bagels location in Edina, Minnesota surprised me with the most generous amount of cream cheese I’ve ever had. It honest to god made my day. Thank you to that person. Now ends this wonderful story.

The ultimate compliment, “you’re more of a Culver’s kind of guy.” @falenkdwb @daveryankdwb

Didn’t expect there to be a billboard that says, “Dave Ryan gave me crabs” in Minneapolis—but it exists! @daveryankdwb @falenkdwb @JennyKDWB

“The guy dying of thirst is now a mineral water critic?” @succession

And on his final eve of his early thirties, he enjoyed writing a tweet about himself in the third person.

Facebook and Insta are down, but us in the Twitter REIGN SUPREME.