B.D.

Holy fuck, he said it out loud

Didn’t think this one would bang this hard Always the stupid shit lol

Like if you want a drunk dm when I go out

When that one girl is liking your tweets >>>

“Don’t double text/text first” only applies if you’re ugly and retarded.

1 thing about my life: It’s good. I don’t worry about shit. But I built it this way. Didn’t happen on accident. If you want to be worry-free, you gotta work.

Word to the Wise: Don’t wait till you see multiple red flags. Recognize that shit early, and act accordingly.

Any of yall have an ex who is so dumbfuck retarded you can’t believe you were ever in a relationship?

Every time I get in/out of the shower

So I did that “what’s your type” test and it was all Mediterranean/latina looking broads. Go figure.

My mom’s dog and my dog DO NOT get along. At all. Like on sight war with each other. So what do you suppose my mom did when she came over?

Being tall’s a curse, but it’s my cross to bear so..

Mom’s coming by to visit; gonna take a couple of advil in advance.

Long distance relationship, but it’s just them living in the IE.

Going to the theatre

The old me thinking, if I had a girl who’d honeypot, we could make a FORTUNE off these execs lol

I’m for this beef

Never understood being too nonchalant. If I like you, I want you to know.

OluKai sandals ftw. Iykyk