@Chapinc

My tweets have been featured in 7-Eleven stores nationwide and InTouch magazine.

 NJ
Joined April 2008
  • Tweets25.3K
  • Following1.6K
  • Followers11.4K
2.1KMedia
No one here writes well enough to justify the length of some of these posts.
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In sports I'm always going to root for the guy with a middle-aged hairline
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The World Series? You know, the unifying monocultural event now accessible only through subscription-based apps.
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Guy on his way out of the liquor store just called out, waving, "Have a great night everybody! Get home safe!" like he was saying goodbye to friends at a bar.
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Fragile Truce would be such a beautiful name for a baby girl
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Your contrarian take is disingenuous and uninteresting.
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The price of my basic NY Times subscription is increasing by 20%. Still no sports.
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Had a good birthday. Got drunk, didn't look at my phone much.
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Every 5-year-old in Brooklyn is more stylish and interesting than I am.
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Rare that you go into a movie with sky-high expectations and they are exceeded.
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Street Fighter was all that and more.
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Havana Syndrome is real. I'm pretty sure my next door neighbors are doing it to me with their music.
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Maybe the male loneliness epidemic is due to the way men greet each other when they do get together
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NJ Transit is the only rail service that can lose a train, Bermuda Triangle style
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That the new press secretary not only is not a lawyer, as claimed, but morever did not even pass the bar exam... the revelation of this lapse in integrity must be weighing heavily on the president.
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Warrant's "Cherry Pie" playing in the office at 10:30 AM. What is happening??
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It's spooky season because so many people are driving around after dark without their headlights on
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A no-nonsense bodyguard (Leighton Meester)
Netflix
@netflixOct 14
A no-nonsense bodyguard (Leighton Meester) is hired to protect a charming action star (Jared Padalecki) over the holidays. Falling for him? That's where things get complicated. GUARDING STARS, based on Katherine Center’s bestselling novel The Bodyguard, premieres November 18.
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I thought calculators already solved the toughest math problems
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Uptight queen barista named Jay at Starbucks on 93 and B'way son or singing mechanical bird named Molly at Art of Play daughter
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