Almost split the church over a simple typo. Who would have thought Vaccination Bible School would be so controversial?

People ask me if I wrote this. No, but I'm wondering about the man who is an almond.

Checking Facebook to see if any of our members cheated on us with other churches over Easter.

I know I can do all things through Christ, but do I really have to do everything around here?

We put the unction in dysfunctional

Clifford If you think about it, a cliff and a ford are 2 geographical features that don't go well together.

Met a guy named "Ridge" Not as edgy as you would think.

So, we have this lady who always uses an alias when she signs up online for anthing. It's really confusing to me, but she's in her 80s. Is it insensitive to say that at least it won't be a problem for too long? I'm not saying it in front of members, but I am thining it.

This is how I'd feel all the time. Good thing He is not like me.

Nose piercings are the answer to the question, "What if I could have a nose pimple more often, but shinier?"

The pastor this month: Thanks for the nice pastor appreciation card! Another nice card! Thanks. It's funny, I got another card just like this one. That's odd, I got a card like this one too. Oh, CVS only had two Pastor appreciation cards again this year.

Their slogan in this fax should be "If you saved more on toner, we wouldn't have wasted as much of your money to print this"

In my defense, the pastor used speech to text, and "Fissures of men" seemed like a good enough sermon title.

Speech to text changed "Mandarin orange" to "Mantrum rage" and now I have a new phrase for when one of the boys throws a fit.

I had to check how extensive my dieting app is

I worry that we leave the spiritual development of our young people to a guy who runs and hides when the copier jams.

So thankful for Miss Irene and all the little decorations she puts up now that she's helping with cleaning the church.