I’m Colleen from twitter

Joined July 2012
Taylor Swift fans are the modern day equivalent of those cults who would consistently have inaccurate rapture predictions like once a month
35
985
137
13,263
Not the times doing a piece on how brain dead my high school is…
Striking detail in the big NYT piece on Taiwanese families adjusting to working at the huge new TSMC chip plant in Arizona: their surprise at the lack of rigor in US schools.
20
1,840
just showed my fiance something on instagram and he asked me “what app is that”
15
1,977
Colleen retweeted
hey man sorry for wanting to move to the best city in the world after being raised in rural whogivesafuckville america. i didn’t know it was reserved only for theater kids from Lowell, MA
134
1,447
147
47,576
696,030
mais uma semana de trabalho
202
16,450
705
111,890
2,056,612
asked my coworker if he knew how to make a paper airplane and he said “no sweetie I’m a Democrat”
11
2,222
Rarely do I share someone else’s words here, but I think it would be hard to nail it better than the Daily Show did:
589
3,997
96
26,579
309,949
Colleen retweeted
i’m sorry but i simply cannot mourn the loss of dolly parton until i know her views on the rwandan genocide, the partition of india, or the annexation of crimea. only then can i decide if her countless contributions to the community were worth anything .
303
2,474
324
52,339
1,587,139
If I tried to jog with these boobs, I'd end up with two black eyes! Enjoy the beautiful weather!!
320
29,374
967
138,192
coworker just sent this after I sent a picture of my dog in our work slack…
49
2,832
some of you have taken these hormonal phase things too far like I hate to break it to you, but you are not in your “luteal phase” you are just a bitch
2
32
2,583
people love to pretend that “it’s not my job to educate you” was just a copout & never pushback on the expectation that the responsibility for stopping bigoted behavior falls entirely on marginalized people w no responsibility for self-education
15
499
4
9,522
240,516
Look, whether or not you can take the phrase "Woke 1" seriously, you have to be able to admit that the left made mistakes. Trump won twice! Whatever we did to win the culture war, it objectively failed! What's the point of denying this?
62
130
36
2,341
93,103
Is it not weird to MAGA that Trump is practicing core parts of communism?
NEW: US government now owns equity stakes in 30 private companies after being involved in 0 just over a year ago, in some instances being the single largest shareholder according to Cato Institute.
87
505
14
3,337
78,743
Colleen retweeted
It’s amazing how much of a 180 I’ve done on dogs. In my early 20s I was all into no-kill shelters and “oh no the poor doggos.” I would have defended the “rehabilitation” of the most f’ed-in-the-head animal. Now at nearly 40 after having kids it’s like, yeah just euthanize the dogs. What are we even doing here. People donate good money to this?
180
79
29
2,881
541,220
Colleen retweeted
I’m of the belief that we’ve been in a “cold” civil war for a while now. Most people might consider the 2016 election to be the starting point, but for me it’s December 14, 2012 and its aftermath.
61
161
19
6,809
642,031
It says a lot that Congress indexed the maximum amount people can donate to their campaigns to inflation, but not the minimum wage.
"The minimum wage is now the lowest it’s been in 70 years," per FORTUNE
4
213
2
870
13,004
knowing stuff makes u rich. A few birds, some architectural styles, a few languages. Just a little here and there and u experience life more richly
20
3,255
147
29,971
991,287
Worker at my nail salon just pulled out a literal parrot from the back of the shop…
1
28
3,471
Says he’s going to start ghost writing for me these are his drafts so far
my coworker just asked that I tweet “Only button that needs to be on the microwave is the +30 seconds one” says it’s gonna do “numbies”
1
69
7,045
my coworker just asked that I tweet “Only button that needs to be on the microwave is the +30 seconds one” says it’s gonna do “numbies”
137
1,012
55
68,248
1,051,980