Handsome Divorced Dad

The embarrassing thing about being a WWE fan is that they feed me the same storyline every 12 months and I do this shit

Plant protein? It’s a no from me dawg.

After being a chef for 22 years and now I guess I’m “somewhat” retired, I have a request for everyone. Stop listening to the AI recipes you see on IG/TikTok. Baking yoghurt and protein powder will not give you a moist and delicious cake. It will however, give you diarrhoea.

Seeing those “healthy” recipes for like tiramisu oats and whatever else people try to trick their brains into enjoying makes me laugh. The voiceover is like “check out this incredibly healthy recipe! You wanna start with 20 litres of maple syrup and a 50 litres of yoghurt” 🫠😂

It’s the summer of cropped dad. Of my shirt goes past my waistband heading into 2027, it’s a skinwalker and not me

Big arms, bigger sad brain

Hello @dayseeker @roryspencer @SLNTPLNT @SilentGarrett could we please get a Brisbane, AUS show venue upgrade, just for me? 😂 I was overseas when tickets were on sale and couldn’t get through the purchasing process to get myself and my partner tickets 🥹🥹

My cats having the zoomies at the same time as my kids having the pre bed zoomies while my favourite sports team played a sudden death match while my dog barked its ass off outside tonight was not overstimulating in the slightest 🫠🫠🫠

Dave Hughes really looks like that crackhead you encounter walking home from the pub that asks you annoying questions. “Oi man where ya been tonight? You fight any cunts man? You fucken goin home to smoke some bongs man? You reckon you could lend me twenty bucks man?”

Get big or die tryin’

I miss Thailand. I miss Bangkok. I miss my culture and my people. But most of all, I miss those god damn 7/11 candies that you can’t get anywhere else in the world 😂

You don’t need reta, or clen, or a crazy gruelling cardio program. What you need to do is come to Thailand and walk 20km everyday for a week and you’ll start to see muscle definition and your veins return after taking the bulk too far 😂 day 7 and I’m feelin LEAN 😂

Hi @SilentGarrett / @SLNTPLNT Politely requesting Superbloom on the setlist in Brisbane when you’re in Australia with Dayseeker. With Love ❤️

Just when you thought Sleep Token couldn’t be worse, this guy comes along and rubs his off tempo stink all over it. The cover/collab no one asked for or needed.

Trying to enjoy my holiday in Thailand and listen to the new God’s Hate and just getting slammed with @bosxe’s voice at the end of a track and melting in my bed. What an amazing man.

SAVE THE CHEERLEADER SAVE THE WORLD 😭

That warm fuzzy feeling of seeing someone that did you dirty get their karma, even if it’s years later, is some fuckin chefs kiss shit. Thank you universe, I am satisfied.

Brick by fuckin brick.

THE GOAT

Last thing I expected to hear this morning at 8am on my way to work was a new @MIWband song start with THIS IS MY BRUTALITY @RheaRipley_WWE LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO 🇦🇺