Dad Bits

Part of marriage is asking another person if they have “any thoughts on dinner?” every day for the rest of your life.

I don’t care how many triangles there are. I don’t want to move a single match stick. And I don’t remember the math order of operations. So stop asking.

Everyone: Please stay indoors due to poor air quality from Canadian wildfires. My kids: Can we have S’mores?!

There are few things more ambitiously delusional than packing a book to read for a weekend trip.

Can we make “I’m more tired than Trump at a cabinet meeting” a standard phrase? Because we all know what that means.

You think you hate homework as a kid? Become a kid’s parent.

Whoever chose the new Alexa voice doesn’t have a teenage daughter. I keep expecting it to ask for 20 bucks and to borrow the car.

I didn’t know a word, but understood. #BadBunny

Everyone in the northeast shutting their garage like they live on Hoth tonight.

I wrote something. Go Bills. ruddybits.com/2026/01/just-m…

It’s the week when we get to blame our standard exhaustion on the clocks changing.

❤️ to L.A., but rooting for Canada 🇨🇦 tonight.

Should we give AI a few beers and see if that inhibits its ambitions and buys us some time?

Reflecting on backyard football games in the 80s/90s, the “Statue of Liberty” play was not nearly as genius or tricky as we thought. IYKYK.

I sure hope the rapture isn’t tomorrow, as I’ve got tickets for Sunday’s Bills game.

The FDA just announced a Cinnamon recall. Luckily, I bought the Cinnamon in my pantry 10 years ago. Phew!

When pigs can fly, I will definitely be ordering pig wings.

I really don’t care how many triangles are in that image. Really don’t.

Unless you are a world-class cyclist, the polka dot jersey is not flattering. Just saying.

Jurassic Park movies are like watching Three’s Company. At some point you’re like, Oh Jack, don’t do that.

Looks like Tour de France Unchained used AI to match dubbing to mouth movement and it is awful.