The DOE groomed me to work on UFOs. I dropped out because they kept gaslighting me about physics. Now I teach conspiracy theories on Twitter.
Joined February 2026
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Great deepdive on Michele Lamy and Rick Owens from @IzzyNGriffn youtube.com/watch?v=A0Z3i6nU…
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Nono, my boomer parents reassure me Speakers Chuck Schumer and Hakeem Jeffries will rally the Democrats to swiftly end the war in Iran, call out Israel's genocide, and prosecute Epstein's accomplices.
Imagine in 1943 Germany just had another election, voted out Hitler, closed down the camps, cut ties with Italy & Japan, pulled all their troops out of France Russia Belgium Netherlands Poland Czechoslovakia Egypt, apologized to the rest of the world, and went back to being a calm normal country.
I hope that happens here… but I think I’m going to be disappointed.
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California's government is run by predators:
- Eric Swalwell: frontrunner for Governor resigned after multiple sexual assault allegations.
- Xavier Becerra: frontrunner for Governor implicated in migrant child trafficking scandal.
- Manny Yekutiel: frontrunner resigned after multiple sexual assault allegations.
- Ruben Gallego: Senator, close personal friends with Swalwell and known for picking up staffers together.
- Scott Weiner: frontrunner for Congress facing multiple sexual assault allegations. Father is a sex offender. Passed laws reducing penalties for sex offenders.
- Gavin Newsom: dated a 19yr old while 39yr old Mayor. Currently Governor and frontrunner for DNC Presidential nomination.
- Matt Dorsey: openly talks about "grooming" his young staffers.
- Sheng Tao: Mayor currently on trial for embezzlment.
- Nancy Pelosi: Speaker of the House widely known for insider trading. Husband has multiple DUIs hit-and-runs.
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Hugh Hefner's widow Crystal Hefner says the Playboy founder raped her. The federal record on Hefner runs from a 1958 FBI memo ordering surveillance of his apartment to a 2026 court filing that says he called the FBI about Jeffrey Epstein in 2005 and nobody called back for fifteen years.
The FBI opened file 145-1414 on him in February 1958 on an informant's tip that he was shooting nude pictures of young models. Headquarters told Chicago on April 9 that "surveillances at the location of Hefner's apartment, particularly in the evening hours, may prove productive." The closing report of June 23, 1958 found no violation and recorded what his acquaintances told agents: "HEFNER too clever to violate Federal or local laws." In 1963 Chicago police arrested him over a Jayne Mansfield pictorial; the Justice Department lawyer called the charge "ridiculous" and the jury hung 7 to 5 for acquittal.
The CIA holds Playboy clippings and no asset file, and no funding memo has surfaced. The honeypot version has a birthday. On November 20, 2017, seven weeks after Hefner died, a Q drop asked "What if Hugh Hefner was /a Clown In America? What is a honeypot? Define blackmail." An anonymous reply supplied the plot, Hefner tapes the guest and sends it to Langley, and that reply is the whole paper trail. What exists is an archive: about 3,000 scrapbooks and a sex diary sit with the Hugh M. Hefner Foundation, which Crystal and Gloria Allred asked two attorneys general to investigate on February 17, 2026, the day after the foundation removed her as president.
The part with a court record is money. In 1961 the backers of the New York Playboy Club bribed the chairman of the State Liquor Authority; two Playboy club officers took immunity and state Republican chairman L. Judson Morhouse was convicted in 1966 for brokering it. In April 1982 the New Jersey Casino Control Commission found Hefner unqualified for a casino licence "because of his payment of bribes to New York officials in the early 1960s." Playboy could keep its chairman or its Atlantic City casino. It sold the casino.
The drug case killed somebody. In March 1974 a Justice strike force and the DEA indicted his executive secretary, Bobbie Arnstein, in a cocaine conspiracy. She drew a 15-year conditional sentence on November 26; in December agents told her of a "contract" on her life. In January 1975 she checked into Chicago's Maryland Hotel under another name and killed herself, leaving a note that Hefner "has never been involved in the criminal activity which is being attributed to him now." He was never charged. Justice closed it for lack of evidence.
No court ever ruled on a sexual allegation against Hefner himself. One ruled on his house: on June 21, 2022 a Santa Monica jury found Bill Cosby sexually assaulted Judy Huth at the Playboy Mansion in 1975, when she was 16, and awarded $500,000. In 2014 Hefner had called Cosby "a good friend for many years." The rest is the 2022 A&E series and the memoirs, down to the Quaalude Holly Madison says he offered her as what "they used to call ... 'thigh openers.'"
On May 21, 2026, thirty-four Epstein survivors suing the United States filed their Fourth Amended Complaint in Doe 1 v. United States (S.D. Fla. 9:25-cv-80880). Audra Christiansen, Miss October 2003, lived at the Mansion in 2005 after Epstein trafficked her and asked Hefner to call the FBI "because she believed that Mr. Hefner had law enforcement connections and clout." "Mr. Hefner called the FBI multiple times on behalf of Ms. Christiansen to report Jeffrey Epstein." The FBI first contacted her in October 2020, a year after Epstein died in his cell. The government's reply on June 4, 2026: the FBI "is not required to investigate every complaint filed." Judge David Leibowitz denied dismissal on September 23 and ordered ninety days of discovery into the Bureau's tip-handling rules.
Sources: FBI files 145-1414 and 145-2826; People v. Morhouse, 21 N.Y.2d 66; Christian Science Monitor, April 15, 1982; TIME, January 27, 1975; Huth v. Cosby, June 21, 2022; Doe 1 v. United States, ECF 104, 110 and 135. The one documented line between Hugh Hefner and the FBI's phone is him calling it about Epstein, and the call sat for fifteen years.
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Top 5 real body doubles in history.
Montgomery's double, 1944. Ten days before D-Day a Royal Army Pay Corps lieutenant named Clifton James, a stage actor for 25 years before the war, flew from Northolt to Gibraltar and on to Algiers in Field Marshal Montgomery's uniform so German watchers would place the invasion commander in the Mediterranean. David Niven recruited him under the pretext of a screen test. He was missing a finger, so he wore a prosthetic. He drank and smoked, which Montgomery did not, so the plane circled Gibraltar for an hour while he sobered up from smuggled gin. There is no sign the Germans moved a single division. He published I Was Monty's Double in 1954 and played both men in the 1958 film.
Montgomery's other double. Keith Banwell toured the Middle East in the same uniform. He was too tall, so his orders were never to step out of the car.
Stalin's decoy, 1945. Felix Dadaev, a Dagestani dancer and juggler pulled from the front after a wound, says he was one of four men who stood in for Stalin at motorcades, rallies and in newsreels. In February 1945 he flew publicly to Yalta while Stalin travelled to the conference in secret. He kept quiet for sixty years and published at 88, in 2008, with the Kremlin's permission. An earlier double, known only as Rashid, trained for two years with Aleksei Dikiy, the actor who played Stalin in the propaganda films.
The CIA's Sukarno, late 1950s. The agency made a pornographic film with a look-alike of Indonesia's president to discredit him. The records are declassified. It is the one case on this list where the double was built to be caught.
The Queen's rehearsal double. Ella Slack, a five-foot BBC employee, stood in for Elizabeth II for more than thirty years: Trooping the Colour, the State Opening of Parliament, the Cenotaph, the carriage routes, so the cameras and the timings could be fixed before the monarch arrived. It started when the Queen complained of sun in her eyes at the Cenotaph and the producers needed someone her height. She was never allowed to sit on the throne, never took a penny, and gave her interviews in 2020.
That is the pattern. Every confirmed double was brief, operational, and attached to someone who later talked. The Clinton swap of 2016 named a Los Angeles impersonator who was taping Lip Sync Battle that afternoon. The Fetterman double of 2023 was one man photographed at 35mm and at 90mm. The Carrey impersonator of 2026 was a prosthetics artist posting his own face. Eighty years of alleged permanent swaps, and not one second man has ever come forward.
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