Comedian | Writer | Dork of all Trades | Retired Weeb | 2000s indie rock nostalgia simp | My fiance's parents say I sound like NPR
Brooklyn, NY
Joined February 2018
- Tweets206
- Following119
- Followers102
- Likes122K
Awesome battle, check it out!
Everyone check out my @RoastBattle against @DevinBramble it was hella fun.
I was also introduced as "the legend" which means I'm old now
youtube.com/watch?v=07ySt-VF…
Thrift Store Luther Vandross retweeted
Crime tech: Vic is a Brian Thompson, 50, CEO of United Healthcare
Lennie Briscoe: Looks like this one will be an out-of-pocket expense
Brian Thompson, CEO of United Healthcare, was shot and killed outside a Manhattan hotel in an apparent targeted attack, law enforcement official says
cnn.it/3CYhrgF
Thrift Store Luther Vandross retweeted
princess mononoke: modernity’s march may be inevitable but with courage and compassion, we can protect the things we love from human exploitation
AI bros: for the price of few acres of rainforest, we could make all this look both much worse and disconcertingly not real.
Thrift Store Luther Vandross retweeted
If you’re AMC a-list you should be allowed to smoke flower inside the theater
1000 years ago this ability would have made her the High Priestesses of the Dynasty of Rodents.
Thrift Store Luther Vandross retweeted
confession time: before i knew how to read the clock i had a line drawn in our backyard, when the shadows reached that line it was time for mickey mouse to air on tv. once my father learned about this he sat me down and taught me how to read it lmao😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Don't want to downplay how gross this is but that last message is so fucking funny I can't take it. Technology has advanced to the point we can simulate wiggers with perfect accuracy.
You’re unable to view this Post because this account owner limits who can view their Posts. Learn more
Thrift Store Luther Vandross retweeted
You should be able to take your dad to an autism assessment for Father’s Day. A bit like how you’d treat your mother to a full body massage, or an afternoon tea
As a kid I used to have nightmares where I was the boy from the velveteen rabbit. Once I went to a Vanderbilt museum with a replica child's bedroom and had flashbacks like some oil baron remembering his impoverished childhood during the great depression.
This Post is from a suspended account. Learn more
Doing a brewery show and shooting the shit with some dude afterwards when his adorable puppy takes a shit on the floor. Why does this man pick it up with his bare hands and drop them into his bare pocket before groaning "Come on Rocky you're dropping chocolate!"?
Niggas don't even obtain letters of marque to engage in privateering against enemies of the crown and the one true faith anymore. We're losing recipes y'all.
@DLTBrunch what the fuck is this?????? You charge people for a boat party that should be included in the price and we get a FUCKING PIRATE SHIP?????? #DLTMalta the boat is even LATE, where are the staff?!!!!
