Dustin

You can only attend your own funeral so many times before you stop resurrecting for people who never came to mourn. Sometimes the closest ones only arrive to bring another shovel.

Hi.

You fuck the duck, I'll count the quacks.

A dog eats each day but wears a collar. A wolf goes hungry at times but answers to no one.

What do you bring to the table? Nothing. I provide. I plan. I fix what’s broken. I pay the bills on time. I drive to where they need to be, teach them to stand up straight, to tell the truth and to work hard. I protect. I lead. I don’t quit. I am the fucking table.

If you ever miss me, remember you are as far away as you pushed me.

A man’s first flowers are often at his funeral.

There are plenty of fish in the sea. Yeah, well the last one took my lure and I don’t feel like fishing anymore.

I’ll be funny again soon guys. I’m just fighting for my life right now.

When you decide to put gas in your car instead of all over yourself and lighting it…

I got a new shirt today.

Heavy.

Like if you know what this is…

I’m just a man trying to outrun the reputation he gave himself when he was at his lowest point in life...

Chuck Norris played the best batman.

A dad forced to miss the everyday moments isn't just missing time with his kids. He's missing the small pieces of their lives that he'll never be able to get back.

Let’s meet up where it doesn’t hurt.

Nobody cares, work harder.

I’m alright/nothing left

Off to work again because I wanted to be funny in high school.