Eric Jonrosh

And just like that, Rock and Delores lived happily ever after. Until they were separated by an earthquake. That was horrendous.

This is it. The last episode. We’ve been through a lot. You? A whirlwind. Me? My eighth divorce … but also my 9th happy marriage. #blessed

Has anyone seen Doris? It seems that I am once again running dangerously low on wine.

The squirrel, sitting quietly before me, was the highest paid performer on the project. Also, the most racist but that’s another tale.

Great art should only be enjoyed with great effort.

Honestly, looking back, we should’ve cut this whole thing into 1,000,000 parts. #SpoilsBeforeDying

The talking cat scene was inspired by that time I was working as a PA on a Meow Mix commercial and accidentally ate a handful of peyote.

I thought I dreamt this. That was a camera device I was speaking into? I thought it was a robot whom I was making charming advances towards.

The man in the blonde wig has appeared. Do your best to not spit vile onyour tube television. Ugh, he makes me nauseous.

If you so choose to have your product advertised in my art, you must have something worthy…or just let me have a lot of it…for free.

This episode is entitled “That’s Jazz.” Named after what I do when I’m inebriated: Point at things and blurt out, “That’s Jazz!”

Pull your pants up and unlock the cage in which you imprison your fine feathered friend, the show is about to begin. #SpoilsBeforeDying

Once again, I thank you for indulging in my stories. Until next time, afkfajkf%d4320…sorry, my rabbit leaped on my keyboard. Farewell.

No felines were harmed in this production. Except for that one who I yelled, “You only got this part because of your powerful father” at.

Ep. 2. The best things are always the 2nd. This. That “Godfather” movie. My wife.

Thank you for viewing my art. Your eyeballs must love you dearly.

Booze. Pills. Two of my favorite things…and also the names of two of my estranged children, who are out there…somewhere…

I developed an addiction to prop cigarettes during the shooting of this masterpiece. Currently, on prop nicotine patches to combat it.

BTS FACT: This opening scene was shot in an abandoned, failed, experimental “adult” Chuck E. Cheese called “Charles Edgar Havarti.”

They say the camera adds 10 lbs. They are correct, and as you can see, it was all added to my already ginormous brain.