Kellie 📕

As September draws near, I often find myself looking back on my journey as a detective and the profound impact of the events that unfolded on September 11, 2001. Hailing from Staten Island, many of my peers pursued noble careers as New York Police Officers, EMS workers, or Firefighters. These individuals embodied selflessness and were always ready to lend a helping hand. For us, "The Job" was more than just a profession; it was an avenue to help our communities. Following four years of service in the Marine Corps, I departed Staten Island and became a police officer on the New Jersey side. My return to New York City in September 2001 was not celebratory. I spent numerous days at Ground Zero in the aftermath of 9/11. During that harrowing period, I couldn't shake the relentless worry of who I might run into or, even worse, who I might not run into. We knew the risks well, yet my friends showed remarkable resilience. When life wasn't getting in the way, we bonded over moments of camaraderie, playing football and reveling in each other's company. Even after the Veterans Day and St. Patrick's Day parades, we would come together, embracing each other, reminiscing about the "glory days," and sharing hearty laughter while attempting to belt out Journey songs-"Don't stop believing." As a detective specializing in crime scenes and identifications in New Jersey, I played a role in identifying remains from the tragedy. We painstakingly combed through rubble from Ground Zero, sifting for remains to bring closure to grieving families. Afterward, we'd head out for a beer, not to sing songs but to numb the pain. Among the debris, the images that hit me the hardest were those of family photos and children's books. Now, working as a children's writer and illustrator, these memories hold an especially poignant place in my heart at times. Several months later, the lists were released. Five of my friends had given their lives. In those days, mental health wasn't a common topic of discussion. We shrugged our shoulders and carried on with our duties. As a crime scene detective, encountering, on average, a deceased individual per week to investigate was the norm. Some cases were more devastating than others, yet I, by God's strength, persevered. Solving crimes was my chosen path, and I believe I have been blessed with the constitution for crime scene work as long as I know it's helping someone else. However, the memories, especially those involving the tragic loss of a child, always weighed heavily on me.. and wow, it feels good getting this off my chest. I've teamed up with GuardianRevival.org, a 501(c)(3). Guardian Revival offers a range of programs, all FREE to veterans and first responders(active, former, and retired). If you are able, please consider sponsoring me (any amount) and Guardian Revival as I take the 1 Mile Challenge during September (Suicide Awareness Month)to raise funds and awareness to reduce veteran and first responder suicide. give.guardianrevival.org/fun… Thanks so much for reading and, most of all, for listening. If you are a veteran or first responder, I highly recommend joining!