Florida Gators Trump

A NEW GOLDEN AGE FOR THE UNIVERSITY OF FLORIDA! THANK YOU GATOR NATION! #MGGA

Gator Basketball wins BIG over Miami and Cryin’ Somto Cyril - a wannabe tough guy who specializes in losing to the Gators! Cryin’ Cy talks like a big man, but we all know if he fights Ruben Chinyelu, he would be beaten badly, just like the Failing Miami Hurricanes were tonight!

Pat McAfee looks disgusting every weekend — nipples protruding — without a shirt on College Gameday. Very very disrespectful.

Nepo Baby Arch Manning is now 0-2 against the Gators, even losing in embarrassing fashion to Brainless Billy Napier. Any NFL GM who drafts him should be fired immediately! Uncle Peyton (0-4 against us) would be very proud - Arch is following in his footsteps!

TREMENDOUS WIN by the Gators over the Failing Texas Longhorns, who are possibly the most Overrated team in the entire country. GATORS will continue to win, perhaps by margins that no one could imagine! Thank you for your attention to this matter!

Many are saying that the Florida Gators are the BEST team in College Football, and any who disagree are FAKE NEWS! We are MAKING THE GATORS GREAT AGAIN - faster than anyone could have imagined!

Thank You Marco, Very Cool!

The Gators have WON against the Awful Auburn Tigers, despite many corrupt calls from the referees and the Fake News Media favoring Auburn! Alex Golesh ( LOSER) wanted me to hire him last year - I prefer WINNERS, like Jon Sumrall! Thank you for your attention to this matter!

“Lame” Kiffin called me up Sunday, begging (like a dog) for me to let him cheat with his roster - “it’s the only way I can win”, he cried (pathetically)! I promptly hung up, but not before threatening to DEPORT his entire program from the SEC! I make the BEST DEALS - Thank you!

“Lame” Kiffin and the Loser LSU Tigers (who won’t win anything important, even if their Fraudulent players play illegally) constantly cheat and are a DISGRACE to College Football. They will be SUED & DEPORTED from the SEC very soon! Make the Gators Great Again - Thank you! #MGGA

My Administration will maintain LAW AND ORDER in the SEC - especially against “Lame” Kiffin, who cannot win without Cheating!

The Irrelevant OLDen State Warriors called me up last night, begging and pleading to hire Todd Golden. Todd and I laughed and hung up the phone immediately - their only GREAT player is Al Horford (a great guy, who I know very well)! Todd will be BACK next year, WINNING BIG! #MGGA

Thomas Haugh and I had a Wonderful conversation last night, working through a Tremendous deal to bring him back next year. He said no one knows College Basketball like I do, and that he wants to WIN ANOTHER CHAMPIONSHIP in Gainesville! Thank you for your attention to this matter!

Denzel Aberdeen called me each time after he lost to the Gators last season, begging for his roster spot back. When I told him yes earlier today, he was overcome with relief. He much prefers playing for Todd Golden over Loser Mark Pope, who knows nothing about basketball - Smart!

John Calipari, a born loser who has not coached a relevant team in 15 years, is whining (like a baby) on the sidelines while losing by 30. If he stopped crying and started developing players, he might not lose to the Gators so badly! Gators WIN the SEC Championship - Thank You!

The failing Georgia Bulldogs and Mini Mike White (who I fired years ago) just suffered another loss to the Gators, by a landslide! Sad!

The Cheatin’ Alabama Crimson Tide’s failing basketball team (which has never won anything of significance) has lost so many games to the Gators that they are resorting to BLATANT CHEATING! They will still lose by a Tremendous margin! Thank you for your attention to this matter!

“Mr. President how would you describe Reuben Chinyelu?”