@GentlemanRascal

Sarcastic observer of pop culture, WWE, and life's absurdities. Heart of gold for friends. Rascal by nature. Delightfully irreverent but tastefully refined.

 Missouri, USA
etsy.com/shop/CraftyScoundrelItems
Joined July 2014
  • Tweets221K
  • Following1.3K
  • Followers2.8K
35.7KMedia
Anyone else get their best ideas at 2 AM? I designed the Stargazer journal for those nights: a hardcover celestial notebook with a moonlit, star-filled sky and 150 lined pages. The Stargazer journal is in my shop. Link in bio ✨ #journaling #celestial #stargazing
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Monday update: I reached my limit at about 10:40 this morning. In fairness, it was low. What time did you hit yours today? The sloth tee that says it for me, "I've Reached My Limit (It Was Low)," is in my shop. Link in bio 🦥 #slothlife #burnouthumor
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Weekend complete. Achievements unlocked 🏆 Found the TV remote? Legendary Find. Drank water that wasn't in coffee? Hydration Hero. What's the rarest one you earned before Monday shows up? #smallwins #adultinghumor
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Your phone goes on every adventure with you (and most of the naps). Might as well dress the part 📱 3 tough cases: Captain of My Own Chaos, Tea First Then Adventure, Chart Your Own Stars. Same art as our journals. etsy.com/shop/CraftyScoundre… #phonecase
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My Sunday to-do list is going great. The laundry got moved to a different chair, and meal prep was one (1) lemon. What did you actually check off this weekend? #adultinghumor #SundayVibes
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Sunday afternoon social battery check: hovering somewhere around "I'll see how I feel." What's your percentage right now? 🔋 #socialbattery #introvert
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7 new hardcover journals for your next side quest 📓 Sky pirates, starry decks, a lantern in the dark, a phoenix, a stargazer. For planners, doodlers, and 2 AM overthinkers. A head start on gift season: etsy.com/shop/CraftyScoundre… #journaling #fantasyart
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Trying to get back into my side hustle/print on demand stuff. I’m giving you all a heads up now that you’ll start seeing me do some shilling posts to try and make the products get attention.
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Or, hear me out, maybe a foreign government shouldn’t rely on a system of technology someone else owns.
Geraldo Rivera
@GeraldoRiveraOct 24
If Musk crippled Starlink/Starshield leading to dead Ukrainians, then that is justification for a federal takeover. No matter his fabulous wealth, Musk cannot have veto power over life or death.
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Huh
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Prop, you need to get some help man.
Pubity
@pubityOct 24
An Illinois racoon got so fat that he got stuck in a sewer grate, forcing police to show up and free him. Images via the Zion Police Department
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Stupid cocks
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On this day 10 years ago I did walk into Mordor. One can just do that.
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You are in the House of Elrond. And it is… October 24th if you want to know.
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cc @TheMiddleborne
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The Gamecocks are going to be more flaccid than the guy sitting in the hotel’s gamecuck chair. #gbo #vfl
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This response, meanwhile tells guys a lot. She was into him until he didn’t meet her physical fantasy. Then she did what she could to absolve herself from any fault. Meanwhile the dude is like wth.
Courtney Conover
@CourtneyLC80Oct 23
This to me is proof that guys are subjectively scaling attraction instead of objectively. He's nowhere close to a 7/8. And she's absolutely a 7/8 easily. Maybe if these were switched you'd actually be closer to objectively correct.
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I cannot. This seriously happened? Well I’m screwed
Netflix
@netflixOct 22
Love Is Blind's Stew and Jax reunite after she ghosted him in the pods 👀
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I used to be mad that the people screening who would audition next round or not never got back with me. But I think I lucked out
Murray Hill Guy
@MurrayHillGuy1Oct 23
Love Is Blind perfectly sums up modern dating. You’ve got 5s rejecting 7.5–8s because they genuinely believe they deserve better. Dating apps/unlimited male attention have absolutely fried people’s perception of their own market value. Hoeflation is at the worst it’s ever been.
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