Finally posting this. Cannot for the life of me find one of those cans of Liquid Death sparkling water: black, golden text… to pair it with. Would have been perfect. Women think birth is tough, but will never know the pain of not being able to match a title to a beverage

It grinds my gears to no end when later media make Palpatine out to just be pure, unadulterated spite and malice. I made a post, kind of a shitpost but not really, a while ago quoting some AI edit of Anakin as Emperor with Padmé by his side and Luke & Leia as a Prince & Princess, respectively; I said that that was what Palpatine wanted for him, and I really believe it, even if I was a bit tongue-in-cheek. His glee at Vader’s loss of Padmé is him understanding the silver lining that Vader will be able to channel grief to power: It was not his goal as such to take Padmé from Vader. If Obi-Wan had been killed on Utapau, Vader would not have set off, and despite being medically “completely healthy”, are we supposed to believe that, what, he would have drained her life-force like a vampire without the trauma? We never otherwise see this and it doesn’t affect Luke or Leia. Palpatine, more than anything else, but not exclusively, is a servant of the idea of power. It is not primarily about him having power as much as it is that there is someone who will embody the ideal. He knows the nature of the Dark Side, and he understands the background of the Rule of Two: he killed his own master. He knows Vader will probably try to kill him at some point. He expects it. Lo and behold, Vader is talking about it, what, a few hours in on Mustafar? But he’s willing to accept that if and when it may come: when Vader proves himself in the moment by undertaking the action. How does he boast to Yoda? Not by saying “Skywalker is mine”, but by saying “Darth Vader will become more powerful than either of us”. He luxuriates in Anakin’s temptation to kill him when he reveals himself. But he also saves his life personally on Mustafar when he did not have to: other Force-sensitives could be found, or he could have had the Kaminoans clone himself or even Vader. He does say to Luke that both Luke and Vader are “his”, and in isolation it would be a strong counterpoint, but it must be weighed against the rest of the film evidence. He’s goading Luke and deliberately trying to rouse his anger. He also told Luke to strike him down; Vader said in ESB that the Emperor has foreseen his own downfall by Luke’s hand. Why Vader defends Palpatine when Luke strikes is a better question: Habit? Attachment? Care? Conflict? Duty? All of the above? Vader proposed that Luke be a “powerful ally”; perhaps Vader is open to forgetting about the Rule of Two. I don’t take what novels, comics, video games, and the backs of cereal boxes say seriously. Cinder is irrelevant to me. Vader’s suit being made deliberately painful is, as a notion, non-canon to me. What we see is Vader as the Emperor’s functional Personal Enforcer, Vizier, or Plenipotentiary, molded by a tradition introduced to him by Palpatine that encourages the seizure of power for oneself, and he was personally equipped with an armada, gifted a fortress, assigned royal guards, and more. Palpatine served power as an ideal, but even this was cut by personal affection for Anakin and later Vader. So even after all I’ve said re: power, he still has a complicated, nuanced, and hypocritical personality, but nowhere in there will you find the Palpatine of Cinder, who is only “Palpatine” in caricature, based on authorial misunderstandings (and probably trying to get one over on pro-Imperial Chuds, targeting even loyal worlds for destruction. Cinder is so stupid). The thesis of power met the antithesis of affection and the synthesis was Vader on the Throne.

Keep your Twi’leks, forget midriff Padmé, your Chiss wife fantasy bores me. Dedra Meero disembarking that Lambda, flanked by Death Troopers, is the sexiest thing in Star Wars