Jeff Allen

Who’s the idiot that decided to start the tradition of fireworks on #NewYearsEve ?Especially at midnight, knowing people have to work the next day. Gosh, I feel like an old man complaining about this.. 🤦🏻‍♂️👨🏻‍🦳🥱

My birthday is in a few days and I just realized that I’m a year younger than I thought I was..😳. I apparently started rounding up my age like 6 months ago and thought I’m about to turn older than I am..😂

I don’t post much, but I bought my first house today.. don’t feel like putting it on FB though haha

It’s that time of year again… 😑🎆❌💤

I need supervision when I go to the grocery store. I went in for just 2 bags of chips and ended up spending $100…🤦🏻‍♂️

Stereotypical day at the fire station. “Rescued” one cat from a tree and another from a locked car..ha

Been sitting in my truck, outside the gym, for 15 minutes. Trying to build up the willpower to go inside..🙄😓

My job was so much easier when the non essentials stayed at home.

Apparently essential employees are also expendable employees

Plus side to the #CoronaVirus my gym is mostly empty! 😂

Didn’t get a “I Voted” sticker at the #Primary today..what’s even the point 😔

I’m 28 and and my 8 year old nephew just asked me “When are you finally going to fall in love?”...shut up you little twerp

Did a mile fun run with my 5 year old nephew this morning! The volunteers throughout the course kept saying things like “Great job! Don’t let your dad beat you!”..😂

Today is my nephews 8th birthday. And we had a family bday party. Little punk snitched on me in front of everyone.. “Uncle Jeff lets me eat whatever I want, watch whatever I want, and stay up as late as I want!”. Got some evil lookin glares 😂😂

If I could wear my boonie hat and @crocs everywhere without looking like I’m in the middle of a mental breakdown, I would..

Zoom zoom zoom, make my heart go boom boom, my supernova girl! ☀️💣💥👩🏻

My dad and I are headed to Alexandria LA for a job..my dad brought actual maps lol

It amazes me that with the amount of cardio I do, 2 flights of stairs still has me a bit winded.. I regularly workout on a stair master with a 60lb vest for about 40 flights.

I. HATE. SUMMER..🔥🥵

How about we send sex offenders to storm #Area51 instead. Then it would be aliens vs predators..