truth seeker @fella_coin
Berlin cucksland
Joined October 2022
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mifella retweeted
Having lived in both the US and Europe, I can absolutely attest to this.
I think the mistake people make is comparing gross salaries rather than the cost of replicating the same quality of life.
The US unquestionably offers greater earnings potential, particularly in certain professions. But once you factor in housing, healthcare, childcare, transport and, importantly, the value of your time, the equation changes quite dramatically.
And it’s not as though London is particularly cheap either.
But the broader point resonates. Once you’ve experienced a lifestyle where more of your time is genuinely your own, you start to appreciate that not everything can be solved by earning another $100k.
At some point, the marginal utility of another dollar is worth considerably less than the marginal utility of another hour with your family.
An interesting theme lately in the American expat community in Western Europe, especially higher earning corporate types (e.g. €200-300K/year), is the feeling of being unable to move back home to the US.
Few reasons...
Many who moved in the years after COVID sold their homes when rates were closer to zero than the rates now. Now that same home is ~20% more expensive while mortgage rates are 2x higher. So the monthly cost of housing like-for-like went up literally 100% in just 3-5 years.
They've gotten used to the European way of life (e.g. no or maybe just one car, easy train and airport access) and its far less intense commercial and career culture... so fewer working hours and more vacations and significant employee protections (i.e. hard to be fired legally).
This is great while living in Europe... a €250K household income is massive even post-tax considering the low relative cost of health care, education, transport, housing, etc...
...but dropping themselves back into US society... especially in a major metro area like NY, SF, Chicago, even Miami now... at age 40-50 with kids... is largely impractical.
Many Europeans would be shocked to learn that ~$250K/year in the US is incomparable to that same level of earnings in a major Western European city like London or Amsterdam or Paris.
I'd estimate the income needed in the US to match the overall quality of life you'd enjoy in one of those European cities... is around $500-750K/year.
Wild.
mifella retweeted
I rearranged my entire life to care for my mother a decade before her death. But yours obviously raised you wrong so we have selfish posts like this. The elderly try to keep their independence as long as possible because it's all they have left and for you to hinder that is indictive of an absolute disaster of a person.
mifella retweeted
My precious big brother took his own life today, in Arkansas. He texted me just before he did it. Please. If you are thinking of ending it all, please reach out. Please pray for my 97 y.o. mom, and my nephew. We are devastated.
mifella retweeted
Socially, very little appears to have recovered to pre-2020 levels anywhere. That whole era sapped the vitality out of absolutely everything.
I mean, where do you "go" if you wish to experience deeply human, alive, socially rich places now?
Aside from traveling vast distances to a handful of interesting conferences, visiting a handful of (rare) Catholic Parishes with a lively coffee hour, and abortive ventures to numerous overpriced, hollow-feeling urban areas, I have not found much since 2020.
Since that time, a patina of anomie has covered everything. For a time, "backwoods" places way off the beaten path seemed to be spared -- but now, via the internet, most of them seem to have contracted the same illness.
Yes, a lot of people will beg to differ, but I believe they are coping. Those who know what I am saying know what I mean; this change is a thing you feel, it cannot be measured. Things only get better if you buy into certain niches, but those places are niches. Gone are the days of wandering the living streets, of social randomness, and the spontaneity that makes us human.
mifella retweeted
Fascinating to think of frugality as a possible idol...
Many start out wary of the "love of money," which is explicitly called out in the Bible as "the root of all kinds of evils."
So they become frugal... but wind up right back where they started, simply in the inverse form.
mifella retweeted
One of the best mental health mantras I've ever heard is "stop stirring muddy water"
When things are going wrong, especially if you're prone to intellectualizing problems, it can feel empowering to keep rehashing the issue
Your brain wants to see if it missed any details because stressing out feels like "doing something"
Often though you're just ruminating, "stirring muddy water," which is making it harder, not easier, to solve the issue
Sometimes you need to do nothing in order to see things clearly
mifella retweeted
If I could go back to my 20s, I would prepare for things nobody told me about.
In my 20s, I thought life was about building a career, earning more, taking risks and moving ahead.
In my 30s, I started realising that some of life’s biggest risks have nothing to do with your career.
Your health can change. Relationships can fall apart. People you love can disappear from your life. Financial stability can become uncertainty overnight. And sometimes, despite doing everything right, life doesn’t go according to plan.
If I could give my younger self one piece of advice, it would be this:
Build your career, but don’t make it your entire identity. Earn money, but also build financial freedom. Chase ambition, but invest in your health and relationships. Learn to succeed, but more importantly, learn to handle setbacks.
Because life doesn’t always test how successful you are. Sometimes, it tests how prepared you are to lose what you thought was permanent.
And perhaps growing up is realising that the most important things in life are often the ones we spend the least time preparing for.
