@MessiahCollege

Messiah College was a nationally ranked, private Christian university of the liberal and applied arts and sciences until we were sent to the shadow realm.

 Mechanicsburg, PA
messiah.edu
Joined September 2020
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Important notice for #messiahuniversity students Please weigh yourself, poop, then weigh yourself again and post both numbers on Canvas BEFORE returning on Monday. This is a new COVID prevention method and it is required by the CDC that all colleges submit their collected data
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In addition to the end of #SpringStaycation we would like to remind students that any discussion of Eurovision and any derivative is strictly prohibited.
Happy snow day everyone! Research the “Dyatlov Pass Incident” and tell me demons don’t walk among us.
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Messiah College retweeted
VOCEDplus@VOCEDplus29 Oct 2020
Did you know employers who take time at the beginning of internships to orient students reap productivity & effectiveness more quickly than those who don't? This @MessiahCollege guide includes an excellent 'Orientation checklist', perfect for #ChecklistDay hdl.voced.edu.au/10707/45212…
Screenshot of VOCEDplus record for 'Starting and maintaining a quality internship program'

ALT Screenshot of VOCEDplus record for 'Starting and maintaining a quality internship program'

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We know what y’all doing in Jordan/Kline at night. We also know what y’all doing in the music rooms. We aren’t going to stop you either.
That didn’t take long
Without chapel not enough people are experiencing the beautiful and heinous smell of Hostetter
Heat is gonna win it all
I am in you’re room, under you’re bed, shaping your dreams. Rest well; you’re atonement arrives regardless.
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Messiah College is a cover operation for a group of elite government agents whose sole purpose is to stop the demiurge from entering our mortal plane
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Sports kinda lame ngl
When you graduate you have to give some of your bones to the giant elephant skeleton in Jordan
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We are using your tuition dollars to hire snipers that shoot cigarettes out of people’s hands to save their life
If you order a Cactus Jack Burger at the Union the workers have the legal right to smush your skull
The same man is always in the printing room. Nobody knows who he is. Messiah College does not have a printing room.
Messiah University was not built in a day; it slowly emerged from a foul pool of filth and blood over about 2 weeks.
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Of course the blood and filth were all ethically sourced
If you have a shirt with a pocket on it you can wear it backwards and anything you put in the pocket will be hidden from God
Wow, did you know Obama is giving away 90% of his money to fund Covid Testing? Google “Obama 90 percent” to learn more!
We do this joke on people who major in theater where we don’t give them a degree. Get a real major like business management consulting.
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