I am a Catholic husband & father who wants to be more human.
For people driven to build →
Joined August 2022
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Every criticism from the Catholic left is just "they have more money than me therefore bad"
I used to have trouble understanding guys who said things like "turn your work into a game, see how fast you can get it done"
I could never muster the energy and there didn't seem to be a point to it.
Now I realize it is because I used to have far less actual work to get done.
Went to Target today just to get out of the house and while I was there some lesbians looked at me and laughed to each other (?) and the guy by the self checkout said “is that it boss?” when I only brought a 12 pack of Red Bull to the register
When I put my boys to bed they have the option between a "little blessing" and a "big blessing".
The little blessing is normal. I put my hand on their head, pray over them, and trace the cross on their forehead.
The big blessing is when I cover their face with my hand, pray the blessing, and trace the cross from the top of their head across their nose to their chin, then from one ear to the other across their eyes while they giggle uncontrollably.
(They always choose the big blessing)
It became obvious to me about 18 months ago that if I wanted to have a big family I would need to pursue either
1. a job in tech (not feasible given my education and experience at my age)
2. real estate (been down that road once, maybe later once I have capital)
3. sales (i applied to many places but didn't find one that made sense for me) or
4. business ownership (doing now)
I spent far too long in my 20s wallowing in a Catholic malaise hoping that someone would give me a cushy podcasting job. Now I'm 30 with 3 kids and there's no time to lose!
Tomorrow I return to work from my short paternity leave. Here are all the movies I watched while staying up late with my baby over the last 10 days and my review of each:
1. End of Evangelion
Human Instrumentality? Just put the Gnosticism in the bag bro
3/5
6. The Thing
Watched it because Allie Beth Stuckey told me I wasn't allowed to be a Christian if I watched it. Still a Christian. Electric, deserves all the hype.
5/5
Today I walked to a friend's house to borrow a bike for my mother in law, who's staying with us to help out with the kids for a few weeks.
On the way, I got stopped 3 times by different families on my street asking about how my wife is doing, asking about the baby, and letting me know that they're available if we need any help in the coming weeks.
We also have a meal train of 3 fully cooked dinners a week for the next month that was organized for us by our friends.
Bike secured and I am legitimately running out of fridge space. Blessed.
I had breakfast with my neighbor this morning. He just had their 6th kid, we just had our 3rd.
He gave me 3 great takeaways as a father of a growing family:
1. I asked him how I can grow in patience with my kids and not get so angry all the time. He told me about The Triple Crown: every morning he does 20 minutes of mindfulness, 20 minutes of exercise, and attends daily Mass. If he can get that in, he's way more likely to stay regulated throughout the day.
2. I told him that I feel doubtful at my ability to achieve anything like The Triple Crown anytime soon. He encouraged me to do really, extremely crappy versions of the things I want to do. A 2 minute run. A breathing exercise for 60 seconds. Show up to daily Mass 15 minutes late with a screaming kid. It's better to do the most important things imperfectly than not at all.
3. He told me that I'm doing great. In his line of work he sees a ton of dysfunctional families. I'm praying with my family, providing for them, and trying my best to love them and lead them well. That little perspective helped.