Ahhhh laah nuh retweeted
I reckon Guy Fawkes plan to blow up Parliament on November 5th was kind of genius because people wouldn't notice the explosions, what with all the fireworks going off & all.
My phone reminded me that I would be 11 months pregnant today. So that was nice.
My own fault, I forgot to delete it all 😩
I’ve just seen this comment on a conspiracy theory video about the recent plane crash in America and honestly it made me laugh WAY more than it should have.
I think the bigger the dog the bigger the discount. I actually can’t feel the heater when it’s on because my dog cooks his arse on it.
Dear @BritishGas,
do you offer discounts for customers whose dogs use up 90% of the heat from the fire just to warm up their arse?


















