@PaperworkNinja

Life assistant coach automatkalashnikovninerarmaliterifle

 EM59, EM60, whatever it takes
Joined March 2011
  • Tweets143K
  • Following584
  • Followers745
8.3KMedia
All right everyone, since it's almost college football season, I'm going to let you in on a secret: NCAA football coaches are all members of the FBI Witness Protection Program. They're given a ridiculous name and spend years learning how to coach at the college level. 1/x
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"Anyway here's Wonderwall"
Khan Noonien Singh
@wtfcetialpha517h
POV: you are about to hear the shittiest music in the entire galaxy and you will not be able to get that smell out of the crew quarters
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I think I see two reasons why Oregon lost today Dylan Raiola and Oregon's uniforms not being colored some shade of dayglo clown vomit. And I don't think Raiola was the main reason.
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*checks scores* Oregon fans, are you okay? You now have something in common with us Southern Illinois fans: we both lost to the heathen Illini this year. I'm here for you.
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I haven't heard from any Oregon fans... Oh no. No. Nonononono... NO, OREGON FANS! DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT! YOU HAVE NEXT WEEK TO LOOK FORWARD TO!
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Holy crap SIU won
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Salukis are playing badly. UNI is matching them crap for crap.
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There's almost as many Northern Iowa fans as Saluki fans here today. Last week's loss really demoralized the fanbase.
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It's is once again Game Day
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Paperwork Ninja retweeted
jimtreacher.substack.com
@jtLOLOct 24
Reuters Pictures
@reuterspicturesOct 22
Lights are reflected off a bulletproof screen as President Trump speaks during a campaign rally in Greenville, North Carolina. More photos of the week: reut.rs/4ie0qQv 📷 Evan Vucci
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Go Rays Only because it's not the Cardinals playing
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And yes, I'm gonna run the "Ein reich, ein volk, Einlanta!" joke about the Falcons retro logo into the ground because that's how I ruin jokes that I make.
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Once again, HR is trying to make me do their job. Our office didn't have this problem when our Personnel team was just two people and our Admin unit was one person.
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Ah, they did this to fish for gender/national origin bullshit. Time to give the "if it was up your ass kicking field goals/throwing javelins/kickboxing in golf shoes you'd know it" answers.
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So the US Open Cup has returned to its rightful place in St. Louis, the One True Soccer Capital of the United States. Is it bad I wish it could have been won by Saint Louis FC instead?
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Huh. An SIU basketball team collapsing in the last five minutes? Couldn't be Carbondale...
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I'm impressed! Dawgs held on to win after dropping from a 10-point lead to a 2-point lead in the last five minutes. They usually collapse and lose.
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You know what? I'm gonna say something, and to be quite honest I don't care who gets mad at me. BUTT TOOTS There. Hate away, haters.
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So this is a dungeon set in Chicago? Is Lou Malnatti the final boss?
Raw Fury | DEEP DISH DUNGEON OUT NOW!!
@RawFuryOct 16
The dungeon doors are now open! ☠️ Deep Dish Dungeon is available NOW on Steam, XBOX Series X|S, and XBOX Game Pass Day One! Embark on your adventure solo or with up to two friends and uncover what lies beneath.

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“I wish pizza came in stew form.” -person that invented the Chicago deep dish
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And just before GTA 6 was due to release
The Sun
@TheSunOct 19
Kim Jong-un ‘in COMA after suffering brain haemorrhage’, wild rumours claim as tyrant ‘rushed to China for treatment’.

Kim Jong-un ‘in COMA after suffering brain haemorrhage’

Kim Jong-un ‘in COMA after suffering brain haemorrhage’

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