Football Stories

In 1998, a TV crew went to film a routine West Ham training session. They accidentally captured one of the most infamous training-ground incidents in Premier League history. During a practice match, Eyal Berkovic went down after a challenge from John Hartson. Hartson tried to pull him back to his feet. Berkovic lashed out at his leg. Hartson responded by kicking his own teammate in the head. The entire thing was caught on camera. West Ham fined Hartson two weeks’ wages. Berkovic then asked the club to cancel the fine. Hartson was later banned for three matches and fined £20,000 by the FA. Berkovic’s assessment of the incident was rather more memorable: “If my head was a ball, it would have been in the top corner.” #westham #epl

In 2017, Adrien Gulfo scored an outrageous overhead kick. Unfortunately, it was into his own net. The Pully Football defender tried an overhead clearance in a Swiss cup semi-final and caught it absolutely perfectly. It put his side 3-1 down. Somehow, Pully still came back to draw 3-3 and win the shootout. A worldie is a worldie. #switzerland #pully

In 2015, a goalkeeper deliberately tore up the penalty spot before facing a penalty. Then he saved it. Augsburg keeper Marwin Hitz used his studs to scrape up the turf while Köln prepared to take the kick. Anthony Modeste stepped up. His standing foot landed on the damaged turf and slipped. Hitz saved the penalty. Augsburg went on to win 1-0. Hitz later admitted what he had done was unfair and apologised. The stadium operators then sent him a bill for €122.92 to repair the penalty spot. #bundesliga #augsburg

In 2016, Sunderland signed Emmanuel Eboué. 22 days later, they terminated his contract. He never played a single game. The former Arsenal defender had joined until the end of the season as Sunderland battled relegation. Then FIFA handed him a one-year ban from all football activity over an unpaid debt to his former agent. Sam Allardyce said Sunderland had been “completely in the dark” about the dispute. Eboué had already spent weeks training with the club and was being prepared for first-team action. Instead, his Sunderland career ended before it ever began. Signed on 9 March. Gone on 31 March. Zero appearances. #Sunderland #epl

In 1997, Roberto Di Matteo needed just 43 seconds to score in the FA Cup final. He picked the ball up inside his own half, drove forward and smashed one in from around 30 yards. At the time, it was the fastest goal ever scored in an FA Cup final at Wembley. Ruud Gulllt's Chelsea beat Middlesbrough 2-0 and won their first major trophy in 26 years. #facup #chelsea

In 2019, a referee scored a goal. Then awarded it. During a Dutch fourth-tier match, referee Maurice Paarhuis got caught in the six-yard box as the ball bounced around. It struck his foot and crossed the line. The goal made it 3-2. Under the laws at the time, the referee was effectively part of the field. Paarhuis later explained it to the players like this: “You have to see me like a corner flag.” So the goal had to stand. Harkemase Boys still recovered to win 4-2. And just to make the whole thing stranger, the law changed shortly afterwards. Today, the same incident would result in play being stopped and restarted with a dropped ball. #knvb #harkemase

Before Riyad Mahrez became a Premier League champion, he had a trial at St Mirren. He escaped Paisley on a borrowed bicycle. In 2009, the unknown 18-year-old spent around two months in Paisley trying to earn a contract. Mahrez later claimed he played four friendlies and scored seven goals, but St Mirren kept delaying a decision on whether to sign him. He also absolutely hated the Scottish winter. At one point, he said he faked an injury just so he could get back inside from the cold. Eventually, his agent told him to come home. There was one problem. Mahrez had left his only pair of football boots at St Mirren’s training ground. So he borrowed a bicycle from someone at his hotel, cycled over to collect them, returned the bike, packed his bags and slipped out through a stairwell to avoid reception. He left without telling St Mirren. A few years later, Leicester City signed him for around £400,000. He became a Premier League champion and PFA Player of the Year. St Mirren’s future superstar had quite literally cycled away. #stmirren #mancity

In 2021, Newport County goalkeeper Tom King scored from 96.01 metres. From a goal kick. The ball caught the wind, bounced once, flew over Cheltenham keeper Josh Griffiths and landed in the net. Guinness World Records later confirmed it as the longest goal ever scored in a competitive football match. King broke the previous record held by Asmir Begović. He later admitted he barely knew how to celebrate. He even apologised to Griffiths afterwards. #Newportcounty #efl

In 1987, Hull City released 18-year-old Dean Windass because they didn't think he'd make it. He spent the next few years working on building sites and packing frozen peas at Birds Eye while trying to get back into football. The manager who released him was Brian Horton. Twenty-one years later, Windass was back at Hull. So was Horton, now as assistant manager. Hull had never played in the top flight and had never even appeared at Wembley. In the 2008 Championship play-off final, Fraizer Campbell worked his way down the right and lifted a cross back toward the edge of the area. The 39-year-old Windass met it first time with a stunning volley. Hull beat Bristol City 1-0 and reached the top flight for the first time in their 104-year history. Afterwards, Windass offered his Man of the Match trophy to Horton. The manager who had released him as a teenager refused it. “That goal’s enough for me.” #hullcity #efl

In 1990, Gary Crosby scored for Nottingham Forest by heading the ball out of the goalkeeper’s hand. The referee allowed it. Manchester City keeper Andy Dibble had caught a cross and was standing with the ball resting on one palm, preparing to release it. He didn’t realise Crosby was still behind him. Crosby crept back onto the pitch, stooped down and headed the ball away without touching Dibble’s hand. He then rolled it into the empty net. City were furious. The goal stood. It was the only goal of the game. Forest won 1-0. Years later, Dibble admitted people still brought it up everywhere he went. Under today’s laws, Crosby wouldn’t get away with it. #Forest #mancity

In 2011, a goalkeeper was attacked by a pitch invader. The referee sent off the goalkeeper. AZ Alkmaar were playing Ajax in the Dutch Cup when a supporter ran onto the pitch and tried to kick goalkeeper Esteban Alvarado from behind. Alvarado avoided the attack, knocked him to the ground... Then lashed out with two kicks while the intruder was lying there. The referee showed Alvarado a red card. AZ manager Gertjan Verbeek was so furious he ordered his entire team off the pitch. The match was abandoned with Ajax leading 1-0. Then the Dutch FA rescinded Alvarado’s red card and ordered the entire game to be replayed from 0-0. But there was another twist. The replay was supposed to be behind closed doors. Instead, only children aged 12 and under, plus their supervisors, were allowed into the stadium. Around 20,000 turned up. AZ won the replay 3-2. #ajax #az

In 2002, a Football League match had to be abandoned because one team ran out of players. Sheffield United v West Brom became known as the Battle of Bramall Lane. United were already down to 10 men after goalkeeper Simon Tracey was sent off early. Then two substitutes changed everything. Georges Santos came on and almost immediately launched into a two-footed tackle on Andy Johnson. There was history between them too. Johnson had fractured Santos’ cheekbone and damaged his eye socket in a previous meeting. Santos was sent off. Patrick Suffo had also just come on. He headbutted Derek McInnes before even touching the ball. He was sent off too. Sheffield United were down to eight. Then Michael Brown and Rob Ullathorne both went off injured after all the substitutions had been used. That left United with six players against West Brom’s 11. The referee later admitted he had already avoided sending off two more Sheffield United players because he was trying to get the match finished. He never got the chance. With fewer than seven players left, the game had to be abandoned. West Brom were leading 3-0. The score was later allowed to stand. #efl #westbrom

In 1980, Clive Allen scored a goal for Crystal Palace that was so powerful it came back out of the net. The referee didn't give it. His free-kick flew into the top corner, smashed off the metal stanchion inside the goal and rebounded straight back onto the pitch. Play simply carried on. Palace lost 3-1. The only thing that stopped the goal counting was the goal itself. #crystalpalace #epl

In 1983, Oxford United and Reading nearly disappeared. The plan was to merge them into one club: Thames Valley Royals. Oxford chairman Robert Maxwell wanted to combine the two clubs, eventually sell both grounds and build a new stadium somewhere between Oxford and Reading. Until then, the new team would alternate home games between the Manor Ground and Elm Park. They'd even combine the club colours. The plan was to wear blue and yellow hoops. Jim Smith was lined up as manager. Both sets of fans revolted. Around 2,000 Oxford supporters occupied the pitch before a game against Wigan, delaying kick-off by 33 minutes. One banner read: “Oxford United loyal, not Thames Valley Royal.” Another simply said: “Knickers, Maxwell.” Reading supporters marched through town carrying a coffin in their club colours. Then the whole thing collapsed in court. The deal relied on Maxwell gaining control of Reading, but opponents challenged how the necessary shares had been issued. A judge froze the transfer. The merger died. Oxford won promotion the following season. Then they won promotion again. By 1985, the club Maxwell said might not survive without the merger was playing in the First Division. #efl #reading

On this day in 2009, a goalkeeper was caught cheating by literally moving the goalposts. Before IFK Göteborg played Örebro, Kim Christensen pushed both posts inwards to make his goal smaller. He thought he’d moved them about 5cm each. TV footage suggested it was closer to 10cm on either side. Around 20 minutes into the match, the referee realised something was wrong and put the goal back to its proper width. Afterwards, Christensen casually admitted he’d done it before after learning the trick from another goalkeeper. Asked if it was fair play, he essentially blamed Örebro for not securing their posts properly. The match finished 0-0. Christensen was reported to the Swedish FA, but escaped punishment for an extraordinary reason: Had the referee caught him, it would only have been a yellow card. The disciplinary committee therefore said it couldn't punish him retrospectively. He literally moved the goalposts and got away with it. #ifkgoteborg #allsvenskan

In 1999, Celtic paid £4.8m for Brazilian international defender Rafael Scheidt. John Barnes had never seen him play live. Barnes reportedly said: “Unlike most Brazilian defenders, he can defend.” Celtic gave Scheidt a four-and-a-half-year contract and even decided he would simply be known as “Rafael”. Probably wise. Then things began to unravel. He needed an appendix operation shortly after arriving, struggled for opportunities and eventually fell out of the picture completely when Martin O’Neill took over. Scheidt later claimed O’Neill told him: “I like footballers who are not like you. I like footballers who play well.” He made just three league appearances for Celtic before being sent back to Brazil on loan. But in late 2002, Scheidt still wanted another chance in Glasgow. His declaration? “I want this year to be known as the Scheidt year.” Unfortunately, by then he no longer qualified for a UK work permit. Celtic eventually paid to terminate the remainder of his contract. £4.8m. Three league appearances. And the Scheidt year never even got started. #celtic #spfl

When Benito Carbone signed for Sheffield Wednesday in 1996, the club unveiled their new Italian star with a plate of pasta. A year later, Paolo Di Canio arrived. Naturally, Wednesday decided the two Italians needed a pizza photoshoot. There was just one problem. The pizza wasn’t even cooked. Carbone and Di Canio were photographed at Hillsborough biting into an uncooked supermarket pizza for the cameras. It’s the sort of gloriously stereotypical player unveiling you suspect a modern communications department might think twice about. Carbone still has the photo framed at home. #sheffwed #efl

Chester City were once saved from administration by an American football coach. Then he appointed himself manager. Then he appointed three captains. Terry Smith took over Chester in 1999 after the club had come close to folding. His background was in American football, not English football. After manager Kevin Ratcliffe resigned following “major differences of opinion”, Smith eventually took charge of the team himself. It was basically Ted Lasso two decades before the TV series. One captain looked after the defence. One captained the midfield. One captained the attack. Former players later recalled American-football-style training drills, detailed “playbooks” being left for them before matches and sessions heavily focused on set-pieces. The results were considerably less innovative. Chester spent the season fighting at the bottom of the Third Division, with Smith’s methods increasingly unpopular as defeats piled up. By December, supporters had seen enough. They held a vote of no confidence in Smith’s management. The result was 86-2. Experienced coach Ian Atkins eventually took control of the football side and almost pulled off an escape. But Chester were relegated on goal difference on the final day, ending 69 years in the Football League. Smith had helped save Chester from disappearing. Less than a year later, they disappeared from the Football League instead. #efl #chestercity

In 2012/13, Watford found a loophole in the Football League’s loan rules. And absolutely rinsed it. They brought in 14 loan players during the season. 10 of them came from Udinese, who were owned by the same family as Watford. The trick was simple: players loaned from overseas clubs were technically treated as full transfers, meaning they weren’t subject to the same restrictions as domestic loanees. Matej Vydra arrived from Udinese, scored 22 goals and was named Championship Player of the Season. Watford reached the play-off final. Then the Football League changed the rules. All 72 clubs voted in favour. Including Watford. #Watford #udinese

In 2010, Khalid Askri made what looked like a huge penalty save in a Moroccan Cup shootout. He turned away and began celebrating. The crowd reacted. Askri looked delighted. Then the ball started moving again. Still spinning, it rolled backwards and crossed the line while he had his back turned. The goal counted. FAR Rabat lost the shootout 7-6. #Morocco #football

In 2012, a cash-strapped Greek football club found a new shirt sponsor. A local brothel. Amateur side Voukefalas unveiled bright pink shirts advertising Villa Erotica and Soula’s House of History after struggling for money during Greece’s financial crisis. The sponsor was 67-year-old brothel owner Soula Alevridou, who paid €1,000 to help the club. Voukefalas’ squad included students, waiters, a bartender and pizza delivery drivers. Then the league stepped in. The shirts were banned from competitive matches, although the club could still display the brothel logos on tracksuits and training gear. Alevridou argued that football was perfectly happy to advertise gambling companies. Voukefalas appealed, but reports months later still had them wearing different shirts in official matches. Points for creativity. #Greece #football