.@KamalaHarris You should have all the musical guests at your rallies cover The Battle Cry of Freedom in their own styles.

Will there be breakfast burritos at the concession stands today @RedSox and if not can we do that next year?

2009 Triple Option Georgia Tech pass yds, including bowl game (which Iowa won): 1774 2023 Brian Ferentz Special, bowl game TBD: 1601 pass yards, which means Iowa needs 173 passing yards to tie. cc @SickosCommittee

How you start a game: Football: Kick-off Hockey: Face-off Basketball: Tip-off Baseball: First Pitch

A Yalie running the Home Town Team? Well I never! #RedSox #CraigBreslow

Iowa had as many 1st downs (4) as fumbles lost (4). Fewer rush yards (20) than Penn State 1st downs (27). Under 15 minutes of possession. There are infinity more of these stats to show how bad this game was offensively #firebrianferentz

it’s too bad they can’t do drafts backwards, like, start with the last pick, build up to the big reveal of who goes #1

.@adidas just got one of your new Whalers jerseys, I love it but I think you may have used the wrong logo file, your shield has a curve up top where the sheild from my vintage poster is straight up and down:

Every time I take an Uber to the airport, I always hope the driver does the "why you going to the airport? flying somewhere?" line from Dumb and Dumber, and every time I'm disappointed.

Trying to picture being rich enough to afford CFP tickets, yet having the fashion sense to wear my cowboy hat and “Dahmer went to Ohio State” tshirt:

If you are a sports fan, you might be interested in something I have made: themicrotron.com/ Inspired by the @RedSox Green Monster!

Another gem from the boxes of junk from my room: the program and lineup from the very first @WolfPackAHL game. IIRC @PJStock28 got 5 for fighting and raised the roof the civic center went nuts and for 2 seconds I forgot my grief for @WhalersPlates

Got this bad boy framed, thanks again @01HockeyMan01 !

cc @WhalersPlates

.@USPS just FYI, but when I order vinyl from @newburycomics and you need to ship it from Brighton, MA to Medford, MA (~10 miles), you don't need to ship it through Jersey City and then Springfield (~452 miles):

“Hey I know it’s your first day but I want to introduce you to Bob Grundlemeyer… Bob here is the head of our Salad Cream division… they’re the folks makin’ sure your salad stays moist.”

The worst part about being a millennial parent is that your kids friends just call you by your first name. I waited like 30 years to be Mr. Voigt, and yet I'm just called Sam. I *still* call my childhood friends parents Mr. and Mrs... this is total horseshit.