Retired Howard Stern (@RetiredHoward) profile picture

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Joined March 2013
Photo by Retired Howard Stern (@RetiredHoward)
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I'm gonna miss "Bagel Wednesday"...
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After I retire I'm gonna have so much more time to wipe my ass.
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I can't wait to retire from working 112 half-days every year.
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During my retirement I am gonna spend a ton of time on my Toto toilet.
The first thing I'm going to do in retirement is read "They Call Me Baba Booey."
I just realized - most of the women at the retirement community don't have teeth!
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How many cats am I allowed to bring to my retirement community?
I'm gonna miss Fred chewing on his pen.
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What will everyone do without me after I retire?
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