"$85 for that tiny jar? What's in it, $80?" “Pilot” is on #RulesofEngagement tonight!
Follow the official Rules of Engagement Twitter page at @RulesEngagement for the latest updates!
I'll make you a deal: before the show, I'll stab you, and while you're dying slowly, you shoot me. #FixUpsAndDowns
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Jeff, are you actually trying to make me pee myself? #AWeeProblem #RulesofEngagement
Celebrate International #TalkLikeAPirateDay today! "We're Pirates! Not sailors!" ARRR! #RulesOfEngagement
“I’m meeting my fiancé here, we’re going to look at some bikes.” #TakingNames #RulesOfEngagement
Who do you think is the better cook? #CookingClass #RulesOfEngagement tonight
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The key is I give him some then I ask him the favor. He’s so relaxed and agreeable he always says yes. #AfterTheLovin
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They're yoga pants. And they're Jen's. #MeatWars #RulesOfEngagement
Hey, I couldn’t help noticing you liking your wife. #TheFiveThings #RulesOfEngagement
It’ll be fun. Everybody loves a baby shower! #AudreysShower #RulesOfEngagement

















