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Slowring

@SlowringTees

An M365 admin who lives the pain and now makes shirts about it.

slowring.com
Joined October 2026
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Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)Photo by Slowring (@SlowringTees)
At the keynote, “watch this” is a demo. In production, it’s the first line of the incident report. #MSIgnite #Microsoft365 slowring.com/products/it-wor…
Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream block lettering on the chest reads “IT WORKED” above “IN THE KEYNOTE”, with no period or graphic.

ALT Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream block lettering on the chest reads “IT WORKED” above “IN THE KEYNOTE”, with no period or graphic.

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Finding an open relay on a tenant you inherited is a rite of passage. You review the connectors. You see a receive connector that shouldn't exist. The spam logs suddenly make sense. Validating and horrifying at the same time.
Redbubble has thousands of IT shirts and almost none of them name what it's actually like to manage an M365 tenant at 2am. Volume without specificity. The jokes are broad, the references are shallow, and the designs are made for everyone and satisfy no one.
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Dynamic group rule looked perfect in the preview. Saved it. Forty minutes later half the company lost their app assignments because one department attribute had a trailing space. Nobody outside Entra understands how a single space ruins a Tuesday.
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MFA fatigue attacks don't just wake you up at 3am. They reshape how you look at every push notification, every sign-in prompt, every conditional access policy you wrote and hoped would hold. Nobody outside the identity layer understands why you're exhausted from a phone buzzing.
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Litigation hold was turned on. Everyone agreed it was turned on. Then legal asks for a mailbox from 2023 and you find out the hold covered the primary but not the archive. You don't sleep. You write a very careful email. You add it to the onboarding checklist forever.
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You assign the license. It says assigned. User still can't access anything. You refresh. Portal says assigned not provisioned. No timeline, no progress bar, no ticket that fixes it. You wait and tell the user it's a Microsoft thing.
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Working as designed is the most demoralizing three words in M365 admin. You reproduce the issue. You document the steps. You wait. The response: working as designed. You're not wrong, but nothing changes. You close the ticket.
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Generic programmer humor doesn't land for M365 admins. You search for a shirt and find 'turn it off and on again' for the thousandth time. A joke that could belong to any IT worker belongs to no one who has managed a tenant at 2am.
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The best thing at an M365 conference isn't the keynote. It's wearing a shirt with AADSTS50058 on it and watching three people in the crowd nod without needing context.
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Public folder migrations: the Exchange task every mail admin postpones until they can't, then regrets immediately. Batch stalls at a percentage that means nothing. Migration report says everything is fine. Cutover deadline is tomorrow.
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I spent years as an M365 admin explaining to legal that 'deleted' doesn't mean what they think in Exchange. Nobody thanked me. So I started making shirts for the people who get it. If the joke needs explaining, it wasn't written for you. Reply with your worst war story.
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Your first sysadmin job is where you start collecting the war stories nobody warned you about. First time you broke production. First all-night migration. First conditional access policy that locked out every executive simultaneously. You don't have the scars yet.
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Every PowerShell admin has a moment where running a command without -WhatIf changed their relationship with scripts forever. You meant to test on one user. You modified 4000 mailboxes in a single pipeline. It's not a best practice. It's a survival tool.
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Retire or wipe. Intune frames it like a radio button. It's not. It's a moral position about someone's laptop, and you make it at 4pm on a Friday. SlowRing made a shirt for that exact feeling.
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Litigation hold is the compliance feature nobody mentions until legal asks why deleted emails are still sitting in a mailbox six months later. You explain that 'deleted' doesn't mean what they think it means in Exchange. Nobody thanks you.
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At Ignite, the men’s-room queue is the only place where “number one priority” is actually a requirements document. #MSIgnite #Microsoft365 slowring.com/products/longes…
Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream text reads “THE LONGEST SESSION” above and “WAS THE MEN’S ROOM” below an illustration of people in cream, black, and orange queuing toward a door marked with a men’s restroom symbol.

ALT Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream text reads “THE LONGEST SESSION” above and “WAS THE MEN’S ROOM” below an illustration of people in cream, black, and orange queuing toward a door marked with a men’s restroom symbol.

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In the keynote, the loading spinner is a dramatic pause. In production, it’s a group breathing exercise. #MSIgnite #Microsoft365 slowring.com/products/it-wor…
Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream block lettering on the chest reads “IT WORKED” above “IN THE KEYNOTE”, with no period or graphic.

ALT Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream block lettering on the chest reads “IT WORKED” above “IN THE KEYNOTE”, with no period or graphic.

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The men’s-room line at Ignite needs a service-level agreement. So far the only guaranteed response is “still waiting.” #MSIgnite #Microsoft365 slowring.com/products/longes…
Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream text reads “THE LONGEST SESSION” above and “WAS THE MEN’S ROOM” below an illustration of people in cream, black, and orange queuing toward a door marked with a men’s restroom symbol.

ALT Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream text reads “THE LONGEST SESSION” above and “WAS THE MEN’S ROOM” below an illustration of people in cream, black, and orange queuing toward a door marked with a men’s restroom symbol.

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My E5 license has more expansion packs than a video game. Somewhere there’s a roadmap labeled “Season Pass.” #MSIgnite #Microsoft365 slowring.com/products/e5-was…
Front mockup of a navy T-shirt on white. White text reads “I THOUGHT E5 WAS ENOUGH” above orange, green and blue squares and a yellow-outlined fourth square with a lock and “ADD-ON REQUIRED.” Yellow text below lists “+ TEAMS PREMIUM,” “+ M365 COPILOT” and “+ VIVA SUITE.” The bottom reads “FOURTH SQUARE SOLD SEPARATELY.”

ALT Front mockup of a navy T-shirt on white. White text reads “I THOUGHT E5 WAS ENOUGH” above orange, green and blue squares and a yellow-outlined fourth square with a lock and “ADD-ON REQUIRED.” Yellow text below lists “+ TEAMS PREMIUM,” “+ M365 COPILOT” and “+ VIVA SUITE.” The bottom reads “FOURTH SQUARE SOLD SEPARATELY.”

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The keynote demo finishes in one slide. My deployment has rebooted enough times to earn loyalty points. #MSIgnite #Microsoft365 slowring.com/products/it-wor…
Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream block lettering on the chest reads “IT WORKED” above “IN THE KEYNOTE”, with no period or graphic.

ALT Front mockup of a black T-shirt on white. Cream block lettering on the chest reads “IT WORKED” above “IN THE KEYNOTE”, with no period or graphic.

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