SORA 🦭🛸☆.｡.:* | “VTUBER”

i’m posting here cause I kind of just wanna vent some thoughts without too many eyes of people I know irl this is a mental health post and I wanna just talk about how annoying it is living with both depression and adhd and how it manifests in my life and how I act I am happy to say I am officially off of my antidepressants and am finally at a point where my withdrawals are slowly disappearing which means I can switch gears to treat my adhd i’m not gonna talk about my mental health journey cause whatever… it doesn’t matter but adhd is a thing i’ve only semi recently become aware of and knowing about it has changed the way I think about a lot of things it makes me wonder if treating depression over adhd was a good choice from the beginning but then again I was never aware of it okay so let’s get into the gross side of me I live in filth, my room is pretty disgusting now I wouldn’t say I live in genuine filth- my living space is clean in the sense that I have no rotting food, nothing that can be considered a biohazard, but I have a really difficult time keeping my spaces clean there is constantly clothes all over my floor and garbage (just wrappers and plastic) and empty cans littering my space and it’s all a result of my lack of motivation and energy I used to think this was cause of depression but now that i’m switching gears to medicate my adhd I realize i’m getting motivation again to keep my space clean it also makes me reflect on streaming in general… I often feel like I seem really lazy and antisocial within the space (and honestly I am, i’m not gonna deny that) cause i’ll have periods where I am extremely social and motivated and then eventually slip into isolation and silence I don’t mean to do this and I do care about those around me but I have a terrible sense of friendship degradation and forget that I need to maintain my relationships which I fear makes me come across as a user cause i’ll often collab with people and then neglect to keep contact this isn’t cause I don’t care but because I am mentally ill, which is not an excuse but I wanna put it in plain and simple words so I can better help myself to change I hope that once I am able to clean up my life and treat my mental illnesses effectively that I can keep momentum on here but for now I wanted to just shout this into the void and if anyone reads all this I hope it can enlighten you as to my thought process mental illness is illness and illness is generally ugly, so if I act ugly please bear with me while I try to make life for myself and those around me beautiful again this post seems like a bummer but i’m writing this happy, it feels good to open my eyes and i’m not gonna promise anything anymore I can’t promise i’ll stream more if things get better and I can’t promise i’ll be more social, but if my content resonates with any of you I hope that you can still find joy in my few contributions to the internet :)

She ask for it and we already seen she got a LOT of them (I know I am late I don't care I was waiting for a stream to post it lol) So instead of just her let's make it a whole parade with some more vtubers and some espectators who wanted to join! Hope ya all like it!🎈 #Sorashart