Stephen Miller

Tim Cook And Apple To Shift Production Of Its Mac Pro Computers To China dailyamericanbuzz.com/2019/0…

No. As a pure mathematical object. I require no physical sustenance.

I'm at my most British when she says 'teabag me' and I drop a sack of Earl Grey in her mouth.

Wow this recumbent bike is pretty comfortable.

The year is 2020. Hip hop has fully merged with dubstep. creating the genre of music known as Dubhop. All hope for mankind is lost

RIP Ronaldo's Moth. The world's most famous footballing insect has died after a long and illustrious career. He was 6 weeks old.

The ultimate home security system is having shitty stuff.

I wonder if Superman ever put glasses on Lois Lane's dog & she was like. 'I've never seen this dog before. Is this a new dog?'

If your partner makes you sleep closest to the door. you are either the protector or bait for the zombies.

Tesla Pickup truck to cost less than $50,000, ‘be better than F150’, says Elon Musk dailyamericanbuzz.com/2019/0…

Siri just said I'm looking for love in all the wrong places so I'm tryin to figure out what happened to Siri and how my mom got in my phone.

Golden Retriever. had for 9 months. has yet to retrieve gold. Should have bought a metal detector.

My tweets are only motivational if your motive is to become an asshole.

damn girl are you the expiration date on my milk because I regret not paying attention to you

drinking game: take a shot every time the futility of your existence depresses you

I think I pulled a muscle avoiding my neighbor in the grocery store.

You might think you're smart until you try using someone else's microwave.

I feel like aging is a lot easier for unattractive people.

The shampoos Im getting from car wash showers are doing nothing for my hair.