Stuart Forbes

Say what you like about Michael Jackson, but he released 63 singles and only one of them was Bad #UKPunDay

My @Netflix / @NetflixJP account keeps spazzing out. Anyone else found this? Kind of defeats the whole point of having a kids profile.

Battle Royale

What idiot called it ‘cunnilingus’ and not ‘the Queen’s head’? #lunchpun

RIP Miho Nakayama. youtu.be/4XjqXVAQB4E?si=2zkB…

I can’t think of a good name for my new invention of a Selotape/Velcro hybrid… Oh well… C’est la vie #LunchPun

God I hope the Koreans do what the Japanese couldn’t and lock that Johnny Somali up for as long as possible

How do you really punish an Englishman? Lock him up and throw away the tea. #LunchPun

What’s up with ChatGPT? It’s hallucinating and gaslighting me even worse than when it first released.

Call a general election because the government broke campaign promises? If we called a general every time a government broke a campaign promise, there’d be one every week.

My nan’s name was Edna. I used to think her surname was Pstairs, because every bedtime she would say “I'm Enda Pstairs.” #lunchpun

Blow the whistle then! #BRIMCI

“Tommy” “Robinson” is just an attention-seeking little whore.

Helpful answers only please: is anyone able to provide me with a genuinely plausible justification for Twitter’s decision to let blocked people see tweets? Pls don’t reply unless you’ve got an answer that might make me go ‘okay, that kind of makes some sort of weird sense’.

There’s an irony in the fact that I’m now going to have to sit through an ad for the ad-free tier when I don’t get the ads in the first place. @restisents

They have designated zones for everything these days.

In 1996, Baddiel, Skinner and The Lightening Seeds sang a song about #England’s 30 years of “hurt”, having not won as much as a sausage since the ‘66 #WorldCup. In the next tournament, that song will be 30 years old.