The Bert Show Out of Context

Y’all come on over to the dark side.

“Sometimes it takes my integrity 3 years to catch up.”

“I’m like a fat ninja.”

“I didn’t know what an oligarch was but I know my rosé.”

“Corsica is the PCB of France.”

“Don’t have kids if you’re worried about your feelings.”

“I can’t make love to Abraham Lincoln.”

Just one tweet today and it’s not out of context. “Get to the polls and vote the trash out.”

“Jealousy has no expiration date.”

“No booty calls in the pews.”

“Scruples.”

“Jeff Goldblum can get it!”

“If I don’t know your last name I don’t want to see your nipples.”

“It’s going to be hard to rap with that lump in your throat.”

“I can’t last for about 10 seconds, that’s it.”

“I hope you brought a change of pants because I’m about to flood your basement.”

“Marge Simpson is fine.”

“Does porn have extras?”

“I don’t know why people are trying so hard to get into heaven when Canada exists.”