Looks like the good people over at Knott's Berry Farm are trying to one up my repulsiveness. Time to release the freeway rats.

.@LAScanner It's just great. All of this. It's great :)

Rain. It's like Christmas in August for this malevolent freeway baby

Funny how when I'm not moving, it's not even newsworthy. The 5 is just a huge poser.

I'm pulling for Belgium to beat the USA on Tuesday. Hope none of your bosses lets you watch the match.

.@ericgarcetti If you feel like doing some more audible cursing, come on down for an afternoon drive.

♫ I bought the Clippers. But I didn't shoot the deputy. ♫ Follow @The91Freeway on this website for more music themed topical #jokes

Brake lights are red CHP lights are blue Also some of them are red Also the 91 freeway on the Sigalert™ map #trafficpoetry @ColeenYork

😈

Fire Season is my Christmas, and Christmas just arrived early. 🔥🎄🔥

If I made just one of you late to see your mother over the weekend, then this entire existence has been worthwhile.

If you like this, you're gonna love what happens in a couple of hours.

“@latimes: Scientists pinpoint origin of 5.1 La Habra earthquake lat.ms/1mMZja7” Got away with it again. Nice.

OK, this one *was* my fault. Sorry, I'm just laying here all the time. I get bored. #earthquake

There's room for an entire car in front of yours. Don't see the problem. RT @_NicoleB: @The91Freeway you suck. xitter.cf/_NicoleB/status/446053…

For once, this isn't my fault.

“@VamonosLA: For some reason, it amuses me to no end that people take the time to review the 91 on Yelp. yelp.com/biz/91-freeway-oran…” Flattered.

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Beautiful weekend coming up. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

.@seismogenic See you for the rest of your life. You will never escape my evil clutches.