Hey guys; I had to get a new phone and it apparently lost all my old NGL messages 😞 But I have a new link, so we can start fresh!! ngl.link/themuppetpastor2

If I hear one more person say “baptism doesn’t matter because the thief on the cross” I may grow skin again! People. Jesus commanded you to get baptized. Do it. Yes, there are circumstances which prevent baptism, kind of like, say, being nailed to a cross? But if you’re NOT nailed to the cross, you don’t have that excuse. Every Christian who can be baptized should be baptized. Yes. I know, baptism alone doesn’t save you. But Peter talked about baptism saving because it is a piece of your journey in the Christian walk with Jesus. I understand the misnomer that some people think baptism saves them, so they don’t have to do anything else. Yes, that’s totally wrong. But I hear so many people proudly declare that they don’t need to be baptized that I fear we’ve made light of an ancient and holy sacrament of the Church. Don’t make excuses: do it. I assure you that Jesus does not care about your list of technicalities; He asked you to be baptized. Don’t confuse baby Christians; encourage them to be baptized. Just make sure they know baptism alone doesn’t save you. Baptism kickstarts your Christian walk in obedience to Jesus.

Do you know who I am the most proud of at the gym? The fat dude who keeps showing up. You have to be happy for someone who decided to change their lives and work hard. You give them fist bumps and encouragement, because a gym is meant to be a place where we build up others.

We’d like to congratulate Sean on his third successful marriage.

Ever have a bad teacher but still believe school should exist? Ever get a speeding ticket but still believe in traffic cops? Ever pay excessive taxes but still love the USA? Sey does not automatically have to hate ICE despite his detention.

Corbie’s story is bringing back my own memories. My experiences were different yet similar in that nobody cared or understood. I started high school as a brand new student who knew absolutely no one in a class of 659 and a school of 3000. So as an insecure 14 year old with no support, I had a home room and study hall with people whose last name was close to mine. There was a beautiful girl who sat behind me. Brunette, curly hair, energetic. She listened to rap back when that was an edgy thing for a suburban white girl to do. She eyed me like a cat seeing a mouse and sexually harassed me for months. Shes always give me a “massage” since she sat behind me. I didn’t ask for it but since I was sitting quietly in my chair, I didn’t know what to else to do but sit there. In study hall, she was next to me, and often put her arms around me, rubbed my shoulders, and used her feet to “explore”. Two teachers saw it and did nothing. As an insecure 14 year old with no friends…I didn’t know what to do, so I just sat there and hoped she would stop. It was strange because on one hand, she was beautiful, and a part of me was excited, but I always felt yucky afterwards because I didn’t ask for it and I didn’t have feelings for her. And guys would tell me how lucky I was, and how I needed to “hit that”. I wasn’t sure what to say, so I just nervously smiled. One girl who sat close to me (she was a southern Baptist and a good girl) told me I needed to report the girl for harassment. “But only men harass women!” I thought. That’s what we’d been taught. Sexual harassment was what evil men did to women; such a lesson had been beaten into my head. So I “knew” that wasn’t an option. And I knew the teachers saw it. So if they wouldn’t do anything, why should I? So I didn’t. As the year progressed, I learned that I could go to the library. So I did that for study hall. And I joined choir, which meant I had a new homeroom. I never told anyone. Especially not my parents. I knew they loved me, but this was embarrassing. I’d been raised to be a good Christian boy. How could I tell them I had sexual dreams about someone , yet that I also didn’t want? I felt they’d be angry at me. I was a confused teenager in high school who missed out on relationships because I couldn’t tell when girls liked me. If they didn’t touch me I figured they didn’t. I had no idea that you weren’t supposed to relate to girls any other way. I just knew that I couldn’t put a finger on them but they had to do that to me. I got over it. Others had it much worse. But I think back to all the mature adults who knew better and let it happen. Who didn’t realize a confused 14 year old might not be a great self advocate. Strangely had the girl been unattractive I think they’d have said something. But they probably thought I was “loving it”. My parents would have understood if I told them. But I didn’t.

Ur-Nammu, king of Ur, angry that a wealthy citizen named Abram was leaving .

“By this it is evident who are the children of God, and who are the children of the devil: whoever does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is the one who does not love his brother.” 1 John 3:10 ESV

People who don’t get jokes make jokes funnier.

My favorite people are the hardcore Atlanta fans who are trying to explain that these aren’t Nazi uniforms.

I’m surprised to hear this because lots of guys would be thrilled to know that a girl likes them and wants to date them. So I’d just tell a guy, “I’d love to spend some time with you.” It’s about as direct a hint that you can drop.

If only there were a flag for “dumbest opinion you’ll hear all day”…

I really should apologize for all the horrible jokes I’m placing on your timeline, but you all know I’m not sorry for it.

Ok, who hired Joel Webbon and Eric Conn to make the logo?