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BREAKING: NFT Obsessed Teenager Meets Jasper Johns, Proceeds To Ask The World’s Most Famous Living Painter Why His Art Has No Utility
BREAKING: Tucker Carlson Sneezes On An LG SmartFridge, Home Appliance Immediately Downloads Twitter And Starts Fudding Ukrainian Relief NFT Project
BREAKING: Vitalik Buterin Secretly Hopes A Freak Scientific Accident During The Ethereum 2.0 Merge Will Turn Him Into A Superhero
BREAKING: Do Kwon Announces Terra/Luna 3.0, Also Wants To Bang Your Wife
#Terra_Luna
BREAKING: Crypto-Obsessed Voter Decides That The Republican Party, Despite Being An Unrepentant Death Cult From The 1800’s, Is Slightly Better On Crypto Than Other Main Political Party
BREAKING: Local Man Sells His Metaverse Property, Tells Friend Who Lost Their Home In The 2008 Housing Crisis That He Now Knows Exactly How They Felt
BREAKING: In Hopes Of Improving User Experience, OpenSea Executive Team Considers Hiring A Second Employee
BREAKING: World’s Leading Team Of Theoretical Physicists Conclude That It Is Scientifically Impossible For Alex Becker To Not Have A Micro-Penis
BREAKING: NFT Twitter Influencer Promises To Send One ETH To 5 Lucky Followers, Is Completely Full Of Shit
The NGMI Times retweeted
ITS HERE teapawt.net/kmoney_69/status/15241…
BREAKING: Hundreds-Of-Thousands On Crypto Twitter Make Mother’s Day Appreciation Posts, Zero Women Actually Reached



















