5. Pain that comes in waves A normal stomach ache isn't the concern. These two patterns are: • Your belly swells, gurgles like air forcing through, and hurts for 2 to 3 days, then you pass a lot of gas, feel relief, and it all comes back later. A growing tumour narrows the bowel and causes a partial blockage. • A constant urge to empty your bowels, even with nothing there, plus pressure and a need to rush. The rectum keeps trying to push out the tumour, so going to the toilet never brings relief. Book a doctor quickly. Sometimes it turns out to be irritable bowel or something else, but let the doctor decide.

12. Keep medication as a last resort Some doctors prescribe low-dose antidepressants that lower sensitivity. They dull your whole body, not just your penis. Only go this way with a doctor, once everything else has failed.

9. Vitamin E oil Buy pure, natural vitamin E (tocopherol), not the synthetic version. Patch test first, since some people react to it. Pierce a vitamin E capsule with a sterile needle, or use oil from a dropper bottle. Cover the whole tag with it using a cotton swab, morning and night. It takes several weeks for the tag to shrink and fall off, and it doesn't work on every tag.