You: I tried calling you 19 times, where have you been?!? Me:

When your dog has the audacity to look like a perfect precious teddy bear angel the moment you’re about to leave

Me in 2011

Anytime I have to pause Midnights to have a real life conversation

TTYL 👋🏼

If you’re not watching the Yom Kippur episode of Entourage right now, literally what are you doing

When I get my matcha hot instead of iced because it’s officially ~*fall*~

Are you trying to hurt me

When it’s 11:42 pm and you just realized you haven’t taken a single sip of water today

People with insomnia: I’ve tried magnesium, melatonin, CBD gummies, CBD oil, every edible in existence, weighted blankets, transcendental meditation, lavender pillow mist, blackout shades, throwing my phone into the ocean Everyone else: idk have you tried just closing your eyes?

When you’re forced to put effort into something for the first time in years

When someone says you shouldn’t be spending $21 a day on cold brew because you can just “make it at home”

The “millennials can’t afford homes because they spend all their money on avocado toast” of 2022

People in 1950: I bet they’ll have flying cars in the future The future:

Me changing my entire personality to fit with my coastal grandmother aesthetic

We honestly earned this

Ok well first of all that’s your opinion

I hope not ✨ sporadically ✨

Me opening Instagram for .0002 seconds

*reads one article about Anna Delvey*