ThingsDadslike

Today

Root beer is pretty good

Lazor pointers

Today

Responding with "that's what the kids are for" when their wife says it's time for a new dishwasher

Telling their wife "that Diet Coke isn't going to make you any skinnier"

Any that that has "beer league" in front of it.

Buying fake tits

Big K

Preferring pot coffee over that Keurig garbage

Saying "the lights are on, but no one's home" when the see someone who is drunk or concussed.

Having a map of the continental United States in their office, and marking places they have done business with a thumbtack.

Saying "Tuesday's are bowling nights"

Saying "this is golf weather" at the first glimpse of warmer weather during the winter.

Not getting too excited about the New Year because they will have the same shitty job and same shitty family

Potato skins

Spinach dip

Having no idea what their wife got the kids for Christmas.