swannface

Sensory nightmare but he only tried to bolt it from the shop three times today, and we are done!

Might need to remortgage

Dropped the eldest and his mate off at ten pin bowling. They were talking girls again in the car 👀. Having a cinema date with Harry. Lovely stuff.

Should have had breakfast shouldn’t I…

Battling greys and zits in the same life period is unfair, and both are out in force this week. Like a hormonal spotty old lady.

Absolutely never getting out of this carpark. Made mistake of driving into the space and now a 10 mile, 4 level queue behind me 😫

Shamone! He was brilliant 🤩

Another night another MJ tribute ✌🏼

Ok, they’ve driven me round the bend today. Wires, noise, arguing, constant grazing, mess, pee on the toilet seat. I am, luckily, shortly handing them over to their dad and fucking off out for a couple of hours 🥳

Voila! #autismmeals

Tonight’s random meal order from the youngest is spaghetti (plain, cheese on the side), with a side of omelette (also plain).

1, 7 and 9

This cupboard fills me with internal rage daily. No family needs this many wires 🤯

J’adore

Tried and failed. But Harry is practically a Gladiator.

Enjoying my second coffee and funky new shirt while the kids ninja.

So, Harry tried to lob the dentists mouth mirror out of an open window 🫣 I will laugh once I’m over the trauma 😂 Suffice to say, she has referred him to a special needs dentist (not sure why it’s taken until he’s 11 tbh)

Tempted to mute the word poppy till December.

“Serving cunt” is an elite compliment. Not sure it would go down well at work, or with the in-laws sadly.

I’m having such a lovely chilled week off with my boys. Cuddles in bed, silliness, watching kids films. Sun is out today too. *Bookmark this tweet for later in the week when I’m on the edge 🤣