Uncle is bringing over a new engine for the boat next summer and oh boy I will not be setting foot on land for WEEKS
Nah just kidding I used to just get hammered on it when it was parked in my drive and blast angry hardcore shit til the early am because I was miserable as hell
Just took my dog out to go bathroom and she stood up on two legs and roundhouse kicked me in the face wtf
One day i will own enough land to grow fruits and make many jams
And a house with a hidden basement to operate a secret jazz bar out of
Thems the goals
This one time I was visiting a now ex girlfriends house for the first time and her dad was charging across the yard with a sword swinging it at some dude. I didn't know at the time they were big into medieval reenactment.
Was a wild way to be introduced to someone's parents man
I think sitting on the porch listening to noir jazz playlists has been working wonders on my mental health.
It good.
Forgot everything the mechanic said about why I smell gas every time I turn the heater on because I was watching the alpacas in the field behind him so that's cool
1am is no time to be thinking about baking a quiche
But alas it is 1am and I am thinking about baking a quiche
Building a trebuchet to lob bags of rocks at anyone who drives by my house and throws firecrackers at my windows this Halloween
The supermarket update still hasn't fixed the infinite coleslaw bug and the self service till only recognizes the real coleslaw, not the dupes. So I just left the store with +99 free coleslaw
