Andee Hardee

Suicide and men. New suicide figures have been published by @ONS: 5,738 suicides were registered for England in 2025. 75% were in men. 1 in 65 men die by suicide. Sometimes when I'm invited to talk about mental health, I ask a question at the end. "How many of you (mixed crowd) struggle with mental health issues?". Maybe one or two in a room of a couple of hundred. Then when everyone leaves, often 10-20 guys will come over and say "I do". Men still have a problem opening up about their mental health, all ages, because the message society still sends is, "it's weakness". October, for some reason is the worst month of the year for me. I go from running 20kph and flying through summer ( well, better than October) to what I can only describe is a descent into every mental health stereotype. Anxiety Fear No energy ( chronic) Hypersomnia ( 28 hours isn't uncommon) Insomnia Suicidal ideation And then the voice pops up. "You could end this here and now ". It's really difficult to explain to anyone who's never had suicidal ideation what it exactly is. Because I run and keep fit I "know" my fitness will pull me through, but many are stuck in a cycle. Maybe use food or alcohol to look for a dopamine hit ( serious mental health issues literally take away your ability to feel anything, an omnipresent numbness), maybe drugs, maybe exercise, maybe work, many even cut themselves to try to feel something. In that context, saying" I'll end it here and now " becomes a relief. It's certainly no cry for help because you've mostly already tried everything and still the black dog comes. Right now I'm at the gym, forced myself to push through but I know a 28 hour sleep may be incoming and that "why don't you..." voice starts to get louder. I've put this out there over 20 years on here so thus isn't for any purpose other than to show that someone who's in the top 1% of health and fitness is as prone to this quite frightening drop off, seemingly from nowhere, so if this is you, you have that voice, then know it's an illness that strikes many, and unfortunately takes a few along the way. I'm lucky, many took the literal leap because the fear is all consuming. There us help, lots of charities I here @MindBodySoleUK @MindCharity @CharitySANE are but a few. But those stats at the top are sobering, and are holding steady. If someone you know is struggling or you think they are, please reach out to them. If you are struggling, please reach out to friends and family.

Suicide. It's world suicide prevention day and month so I hope you spare this post a little time whether you struggle or not. Suicide is the counter intuitive desire or need to short circuit the most human desire. The desire to live. Many of you struggle and over 15 years of posting here I've posted my suicidal ideation, and brutal truth of wanting, needing to end my life. And I receive emails of your stories wanting the same at times. 2 years ago I had a full breakdown. Train platforms multiple times a day, bridges, thinking 24/7 of ways to make it quick. The most terrifying months of my life. I ran instead. A blessed relief and way out that literally saved my life alongside friends, family and therapy. Wanting to die isn't normal. For anyone. Ever. It is ghe most serious red flag that identifies that person as very ill and in need of urgent and serious help. The NHS is wonderful but the coffers as we know are empty and mental health support is creaking at a time when ur should be providing basic talking therapy, ongoing support and meditation if necessary. So many people are taking their life because of a lack of support which leads to hopelessness. I'm anxious writing this because the earlier darker nights forme are one of a number of profound triggers. It sounds absurd doesn't it but that's the nature of everyone's individual mental health triggers, the can sound absurd to many so you keep quiet and plough on through. Multiply those triggers by 10 and for those who don't struggle it's an idea of the constant triggering that eventually becomes too much. Overwhelming. If you don't struggle you may pass over this post without understanding that your Mum, Dad, Sister, Brother, partner or friend may be going through what I've set out above, and are close to doing something that could change a dozen lives. So I hope that if nothing else, if you believe one of those loved ones may be struggling, and I don't mean feeling blue, I mean fundemental changes you've seen ( men over 50 are chronically bad at speaking up), then please talk to them today. Mental health issues aren't ever cured, they're managed, and life can be as normal as anyone else's even if those issues crop up regularly, but suicidal ideation destroys one life in its entirety but always a domino effect of many others who love or knew that person who took their own life. I'll repeat, thinking about taking your own life is the ultimate in being poorly and needs urgent attention, help and understanding. It's never to be left. To those who struggle, please speak to someone, even one outlet can make a difference and have absolute belief that brighter days will come, because they always do. 740,000 people took their own life on this planet last year. Doesn't sound many until you add the 5, 10, 20 people that then affects for life. If you suspect you're struggling, please reach out and if you know someone who is, please talk to them, you have no idea the impact it makes. #WorldSuicidePreventionDay