So many autistic men need a little dating coaching. Ideally from someone who isn't a TikToker milking them for engagement. A lot of this, for men, depends on (a) how interested you are in seeing out sexual engagement, and (b) how willing you are to work towards that, how sexually motivated you are in what you do and how you choose to do it, and whether a desire for sex spurs you to take concrete steps to have it. This means learning things that can be hard, like adjusting for others' perceptions, to say nothing of dealing with new people in a way that isn't off-putting. But it doesn't have to be as hard as it might seem. Yeah, you do have to learn what expressions on your face actually look like to other people. Yeah, you have to be willing to work at things like turn-taking in conversation. If all social basics feel like a really high bar, then you've got to work at it. But oftentimes what is off-putting to 60% of the population may be something that 20% don't give a shit about while 10% find it endearing, and different people come in all different levels of tolerance for oddity. If you don't actively seek out sexual experiences and sexual partners, whether because your desire for sex is intermittent ot because a high sex drive do not translate into seeking and carrying out optimal strategies for attracting and retaining partners, relationships in which sex is a component are less likely. If I were advising an autistic guy on how to package and present himself on a dating app (before you even get to how to act on a date), the number one suggestion I would give is: find a way to stand out and do so authentically. Not by lying or pretending to be someone you're not, but take things about you that are distinctive and find ways to express them in your profile. You're not normal, show that you have the balls not to pretend otherwise. If the app asks you to list your interests, list some of your actual interests. Yeah, even those weird ones that almost nobody gives a shit about, ideally in a way that conveys why you think they're cool. Don't try to converge with some imagined norm of maximally appealing to everybody. You don't want everybody and aren't going to be for everybody. It's a point in your favor to convey that you are looking for something specific and aren't just out for literally any woman who says yes. Go ahead and list your deal-breakers. It's perfectly fine to straight-up say you're autistic and even "don't be surprised if I don't make eye-contact" or "I don't want to meet anywhere where music is playing" or whatever. Something like "swipe left if you are looking for a normal guy" is fine. The women who swipe right after seeing that are way less likely to lead to an hour of agony pretending to be somebody else as you sit in a coffee shop across from someone you'll never speak to again. Most importantly, be unmistakably and peculiarly you in a way that catches attention, ideally the attention of the kind of person you hope to attract. Only you can figure out what that would look like. For example, when I was on online dating sites, I eventually hit on writing my entire "about me" section in rhymed iambic pentameter couplets with the line breaks deleted, and only in the last sentence remarked that the whole paragraph had been in rhymed iambic pentameter. You wouldn't believe how many matched with me and opened with "you had me at iambic pentameter." Seriously. Half the battle is just standing out, and standing out to the kind of person you want. Learning the optimal way to see and carry yourself as a full version of your non-standard self rather than a defective version of a standard you deviate from will do wonders for you. Some autistic men have very intense sexual desires. In one case-control study of 96 autistic and 96 non-autistic adults, 30.4% of autistic men exceeeded the study's hypersexuality cutoff compared /w 3.5% of male controls, whereas women showed no statistically significant divergence. 20% of autistic men reported a desire to have sexual intercourse multiple times a day, while not a single female respondent or male human control reported same. And nobody reported an actual frequency that high. I'd bet anything there's a tendency for sexuality, when salient and when experienced in a certain way, to turn into a "special interest," one of those domains into which repetitive or focused attention and sensory-seeking get channelled. Oftentimes I'm guessing that may translate into a lot of disregulated jerking off and fantasizing. But for many I think it can be made to translate into something awesome with the right effort and strategy. Actual dating and finding sexual partners means putting the lotion away and doing the work.