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Just because someone’s your friend doesn’t mean you have to defend actions you know are wrong. There's a point where loyalty becomes enabling.
If you actually care about them, talk to them directly and hold them accountable. It's okay to not cover for bad behavior. Instead, meet it dead on and help them learn and change.
breathe. you'll pull through ♠️🪽 🦯 retweeted
Millennials are the most nostalgic generation. We are homesick for a place that doesn't exist. Because it wasn't a place.. it was a time. A time with the perfect amount of social media, flip phones, burned CD's, local shows, and real human connection.
pressuring a victim into "proving" they're a victim by disclosing information that's traumatic so "you" can confirm it is not helping the cause. it's demoralizing and it puts them on the defense which is the last thing you should ever do to someone who's endured serious shit.
I'm having flashbacks to the social workers who bullied me into talking by asking leading questions backed by intimidation to confess things about my dad that didn't even happen. it was my mother but they didn't fucking try. they were callous and wanted to seal their narrative.
mini crash out complete. I have big feelings about the way twitter largely handles the delicate nature of supporting victims 😭😭 I'll 🤐 now 👍
if they're your friend, it's doing them a favor to call them out on concening or disruptive actions and behaviors. communication is uncomfortable sometimes, but if you're coming from a good place, with care for them at the forefront, it's worth the confrontation.
really good thread on the profound consequences of cptsd. I still struggle well into adulthood to unlearn the behavioral symptoms of my trauma. at least now I can connect the dots and can catch myself when I start acting out when the trauma ticks occur around loved ones.
CPTSD CAN MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU ARE THE PROBLEM, EVEN WHEN YOU WERE THE ONE WHO GOT HURT.
1. YOU START BLAMING YOURSELF FOR YOUR SURVIVAL RESPONSES.
You apologise for being emotional. You feel guilty for needing reassurance. You judge yourself for shutting down, overthinking, or struggling to trust people. Eventually, you forget that some of these reactions developed while you were trying to cope with experiences that overwhelmed you.
openness to being wrong, hearing constructive criticism, apologizing, and accepting accountability are good human qualities. it's ok to admit that you fucked up. it's ok to change your mind with new information. let these things humble you so you can become a better person.
it is crucial to hear victims out but also to understand if they don't have their voice yet because they're still in the thick of it & haven't begun to process their experience. part of protecting them is asking what they need in that moment & how you can show up for them.
