the lonely boner seems to free his load at night

real life buddy who is always on but trash at game

this ain’t planet fitness buddy. if i wanna blare eminem and grunt im gonna

i like my tweets like my dick. short and sweet

i have a fetish for chicks with crohn’s disease

i can do dungeons but not dragons bro

hammered at home guys

constantly digging at my ass

my pussy is so tight it’ll circumcise you if i’m not wet

my asshole looks like a blooming onion

figured you’d all like that one. heres a joke about my asshole

constantly fingering my pussy

making a hut out of my own shit

constantly got my hand on my dick

i dig myself in a deeper hole daily

i’d dump the chick if she saw me get knocked out even if she was ok about it

pull ur nuts out too when u piss. perch ur dick on them so hands don’t need washed

the worst part about being a bouncer is pulling chicks hands out of each other hair