A beautiful sharp-shinned hawk from last night

Night walk

If at any point in life you do something even remotely embarrassing, it’s over. Everyone will look at you differently. A24 will film a parody about you

Nighttime driving

That friend who’s been learning Japanese for 20 years

Little guys

(holding boyfriends cheeks in my hands) Don’t forget that, at heart, you’re a rat. You can blend in with humans if you want. But don’t forget that

Vanishing point

(cheap earbuds picking up radio frequencies) Agent, your target is on this train. He’s sitting, no, more like slouching across two separate seats. (straightening my posture) A man wearing a horribly tacky outfit. (adjusting cowboy hat) Agent, your target is deeply unintelligent

People in my lane: mud golems with no particular purpose in life other than waiting in line and they love it People in the lane next to mine: perfect ninja cyborgs using wifi & pheromones to communicate in real time. 2 milliseconds reaction time

Tufted titmice

Day at a farm

You should be able to run apps inside of your body. I want email fists

Today’s walk

All that karma does is get you reincarnated as a fly and you have a few hours to bang into as many windows as you can like a Donkey Kong bonus level and then you’re reborn as a human again to toil

It takes about 2,500 years for the human body to digest anything. There’s food inside of you that predates the Roman Empire

Visited my dad after 7 years and he became a celtic larper. He’s got beard braids. He blew a gjallarhorn and the rest of the family came downstairs for dinner

Oblique shadows on stucco

(on tow truck planet, shouting while dragging an enemy tow truck into a corrosive sandstorm) in this world it’s tow or get towed