Yoga Girlfriend™

just took my oath

talked to my mom just now and she said "did you hear the disturbing news" and I was like yeah :( patrick stewart, so sad and she was like "no, [brother in law] had to get his finger amputated" and i was like OH, yes, I heard

should i make a patrick stewart memorial post on my professional instagram

do any oomfs do instacart for work or as a side gig and do you like it

william shatner dont make unnecessary journeys

the apple pic was my lock screen for so long and once I lost my phone in a bar and someone was like "who lost a phone? The background is an old guy picking apples" and when I was like oh that's mine he asked if it was a picture of my dad and I had to say no he's from star trek 😭

not to be non monogamous on main but going from two boyfriends to one boyfriend after four years is like... why am i not being attended to at all times??? i feel like someone should be paying attention to me?????

when you ask him to stop using reaction gifs when you're sexting

nathan fielder was robbed

chiming in to say: lol. lmao even

is it ok if i find steak delicious

having to put my face on business cards cause there are 80000 sarahs teaching yoga in the portland area

sick as fuck, revoked my own babygirl status, no one's signed up for my class [yet]

ilya rosanov

broke up with my dilf boyfriend now im just in an age appropriate relationship, you hate to see it

sexiest radioactive apocalyptic dilf

neck

this app fucking sucks cause muting doesn't even matter, twitter will just show you shit you've muted if someone has quoted it