From a supporter: l always said you were the best looking man on Twitter and I still stand by it. Shame you’ve got a kitchen like a junkies squat

127 metres up
Joined November 2009
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Chris retweeted
Here we go again. Above inflation rise to the minimum wage which will cause even more pressure on businesses and feed into inflation. It will make life even less affordable for the lowest paid. Cue the usual "your business isn't viable if you cant afford to pay a living wage" posts from the terminally thick that would struggle to run a bath, never mind a business or employ people. Here, for anyone that can be bothered to educate themselves even in the slightest, is why the circa 50% rise in minimum wage in the last 6 years has made life less affordable and contributed to the cost of living crisis. Minimum wage employee 2020: Total cost to employer (wages + NI + pension): £18,460 Employee can make 18,460 widgets in a year. Cost per widget (ignoring any other cost or profit): £1 Take-home pay: £15,202 Widgets the employee can afford: 15,202 2027 min wage of of £13.20: Total cost to employer (wages + NI + pension): £29,436 Widgets made in a year (same productivity): 18,460 Cost per widget: £1.59 Take-home pay: £22,050 Widgets the employee can afford: 13,868 They’ve had a 45% increase in take-home pay but can afford 9% fewer widgets. This is why you are worse off. Now factor in other business costs, higher corporation tax, higher energy costs, higher risk from new legislation, maintaining pay differential, etc. etc. etc.. Yet the thick "yOuR bUsInEsS iSnT ViAbLe iF yOu cAnT aFfoRd AnOtHeR 50p" brigade are out in force championing this. Just increase the tax free allowance and reduce spending, for f***s sake. They are just driving businesses off a cliff in the UK.
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“You boy, which pickle and preserve is on offer tomorrow?”
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Kylie Minogue says it’s nice that bikers are doing their annual ride for Children In Need but she still thinks they’re cunts
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Replying to @MTGraveStudio
I see dead people
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“I see dead people”
If the epitaph on your tombstone had to be a movie quote... Which one would you want it to be??
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Beyoncé 😂😂😂 Fucking brilliant
Ranking the best female voices in the world I've heard so far
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“Now then Andy, tell the public that the cost of living crisis will be helped by shaving a few pence of gherkins and marmalade”
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Chris retweeted
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😂😂😂
Bend over Britain, it’s budget time.
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Of course they would, you lot are running the place into the ground ya useless fuckers
Those bankrolling Farage apparently love Britain so much they'd rather be anywhere but Britain. independent.co.uk/news/uk/po…
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Replying to @tittyfalar
I bought gherkins, they were on offer 😉
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Obviously I don’t speak Diego but this is funny as fuck
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Something’s afoot 🤔
Replying to @Cash_Traderr
Yes, confirmed via FNN (Fuji TV) interview with Disaster Minister Goshi Hosono. On Nov 2, as the new Disaster Prevention Agency launches, an “emergency request” will urge all households to stock at least 3 days (ideally 1 week) of food, water and toilet supplies. This amplifies longstanding official guidance (Cabinet Office/MAFF) for self-reliance in major quakes like Nankai Trough or Tokyo capital events, where help may take days. No new imminent threat announced.
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Please listen 🙏
The uncomfortable truth about electric cars…🚙 #RichardHammond
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To the replies 😂
The time for talk has long passed. This government is putting its money where its mouth is when it comes to supporting women and girls. We'll back practical action to confine misogyny to the history books - in public services, workplaces, and online. theguardian.com/society/2026…
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Any party with a serious claim to bring growth back to Britain should look at this list and steal most of it.
Britain is broke. And to fix it, we need to start growing again. That’s why Reform’s Economic Rescue Plan includes these 64 pro-growth measures I’d take if I were Chancellor: 𝗨𝗻𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗡𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗵 𝗦𝗲𝗮 1. Approve Rosebank 2. Restart oil and gas licensing 3. Legalise onshore exploration 4. Abolish the Energy Profits Levy 5. Restore maximum economic extraction as the North Sea regulator's objective 𝗥𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗱𝘂𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻 6. Abolish the Emissions Trading Scheme 7. Halt the Carbon Border Adjustment Mechanism 8. Repudiate AR7 contracts for difference and scrap AR8 9. Implement the Fingleton Review on nuclear in full 10. Automatically approve French and South Korean nuclear designs 𝗚𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝗢𝘂𝗿 𝗖𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗲𝘀 11. Cut affordable housing requirements on brownfield sites 12. Permitted Development Right for brownfield housing 13. Repeal Biodiversity Net Gain 14. Exit the Aarhus Convention 15. Repeal and reform the Habitats Regulations, including Nutrient Neutrality 16. End the boiler ban 17. Legalise air conditioning to meet overheating rules 18. Remove mandatory EPC improvements 19. Revoke the Future Homes Standard 20. Repeal the Renters' Rights Act 𝗕𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹 𝗡𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗜𝗻𝗳𝗿𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗿𝘂𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 21. Legislate approval for new runways at Heathrow and Gatwick 22. Auction airport landing slots 23. End 'target-consistent' carbon pricing in project evaluation 24. Ban carbon emissions considerations in planning applications 25. Fast-track all water reservoirs as nationally significant projects 26. Make Development Consent Orders a true one-stop shop 27. Restrict judicial review of ministerial planning decisions 28. Scrap Net Zero construction rules 29. Scrap the social value test in procurement 30. Lift launch limits at SaxaVord Spaceport 31. Open completed sections of East-West Rail 𝗝𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗜 𝗥𝗲𝘃𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 32. Review regulatory barriers to AI adoption 33. Permit on-site gas generation for data centres and industry 𝗥𝗲𝗱𝘂𝗰𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗛𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗶𝘀𝗵 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗲𝗿𝘀 34. Cut Employer NI back to 13.8% 35. Introduce a migrant worker levy 36. Repeal the Employment Rights Act 37. Clarify that workplace rights don't require mandatory training courses 38. Let experienced tradesmen work on government contracts without CSCS qualifications 𝗨𝗻𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗜𝗻𝘃𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗘𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗼𝗺𝘆 39. Review bank capital requirements to boost lending 40. Rule out Net Zero in financial regulators' remits 41. Repeal climate-related financial disclosure rules 𝗚𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗠𝗼𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗶𝘀𝘁𝘀 𝗠𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 42. Scrap airport 'surface access strategies' 43. Abolish the electric vehicle mandates 44. Apply domestic GB hours to all UK HGV trips 45. Ban Low-Traffic Neighbourhoods 46. Back the M4 Relief Road 47. Move a new car's first MOT to four years 48. Abolish the Renewable Transport Fuel Obligation 𝗨𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗕𝗿𝗲𝘅𝗶𝘁 𝗙𝗿𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗼𝗺𝘀 49. Replace GDPR with a New Zealand-style Privacy Act 50. Fully re-legalise Imperial units 51. Review all unchanged EU law 52. Automatically repeal remaining EU law in 5 years unless retained 𝗚𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝗗𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗴𝘂𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 𝗠𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲𝘀 53. Make quarterly Making Tax Digital reporting voluntary 54. Reduce legal obligations on SME Non-Executive Directors 55. Double permission-free event days from 28 to 56 56. Make pavement dining licences automatic and permanent 57. Let shops open until 10pm, except Sundays 58. Repeal board diversity and inclusion rules 59. Remove the Sustainable Aviation Fuel mandate 60. Abolish the packaging tax 61. Scrap BBC and Channel 4 priority on streaming platforms 62. Remove the Public Sector Equality Duty 63. Five-year sunset on all QUANGOs 64. Five-year sunset clause on all new regulations And there are more to come! Britain’s full potential is waiting to be unleashed 🚀
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You’ll never guess what I’m cooking tonight people, Confit of Gherkin with a Marmalade reduction, thought I’d take advantage of the massive price reductions #CostOfLiving
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Makes me want to sign up for Paramount😂
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Anyone STILL citing the failed Dublin Agreement as the reason for small boats is fundamentally dishonest. Was trying to think of an “or” to add to that sentence but there isn’t one.
Second referendum campaign is going to be like shooting fish
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😂 Nick Ferrari bursts out laughing as Business Secretary Jonathan Reynolds is forced to sell the latest government gimmick live on @LBC Reynolds looked thoroughly embarrassed as he tried to sell the plan to scrap import tariffs on a list of “everyday essentials”. When Ferrari asked him which products were included and what the actual savings would be, Reynolds immediately started dampening expectations, sheepishly admitting these were “not huge reductions” before reeling off the list: baked beans, chocolate, gherkins… That’s as far as he got. Ferrari could not contain himself and burst out laughing. 😭 Nick then pointed out that the Conservatives have called the projected saving of £21 per year “derisory”. You could see Reynolds was mortified reading it out. Imagine the brief he opened this morning and realised he had to go on air and sell this to the public. 😬 What a farce. Even on the government’s own figures, this works out at roughly 40p a week for the average household. Forty pence a week. You lucky people. Another pointless gimmick that will have zero material impact on people’s lives.
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