Don't believe everything you read on the internet. -Aristotle
Canazei (TN)
Joined September 2010
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martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
This is what an EXCEPTIONAL mindset thinks like and sounds like.
So impressive from a 22 years old.
Not only you CAN control what you think, and how you think it and why, but you SHOULD.
See your mind as a skill and practice it as such.
martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
It just seems implausible this is what we are made of, essentially, nanotechnology about a billion years beyond anything we can design or make ourselves.
martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
Over coffee this morning my wife said, “Did you hear anything I just said?”
I thought to myself, “That’s an odd way to start a conversation.”
martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
Fred had been suffering from terrible headaches for over twenty years.
Finally, he went to see a specialist. After a long examination, the doctor said:
“Fred, the good news is that I can cure your headaches. The bad news is… it will require castration.
You have a rare condition where your testicles press against your spine, causing the pain. Removing them is the only way to relieve the pressure.”
Fred was stunned and devastated. But after decades of constant pain, he reluctantly agreed to the surgery.
When he left the hospital, he felt strange and incomplete—but for the first time in twenty years, he had no headache.
As he walked down the street, he decided this was a turning point. A fresh start.
Maybe even a new wardrobe.
He passed a men’s clothing store and thought, Why not?
Inside, he told the salesman, “I’d like a new suit.”
The elderly tailor looked him up and down and said, “You’re a size 44 long.”
Fred laughed. “That’s right! How did you know?”
“Been in the business sixty years,” the tailor replied.
Fred tried on the suit—it fit perfectly.
“How about a shirt?” the tailor asked, studying him again.
“34 sleeve, 16½ neck.”
“That’s amazing,” Fred said. “Exactly right.”
“Sixty years,” the tailor said again.
Feeling great, Fred walked around the store in his new clothes. Then the tailor asked,
“How about some new underwear?”
“Sure,” Fred said.
The tailor looked him over and said, “Size 36.”
Fred laughed loudly. “Ah, got you there! I’ve worn size 34 since I was eighteen.”
The tailor shook his head.
“No, you can’t wear size 34. Size 34 would press your testicles right up against the base of your spine…”
“…and give you one terrible headache.”
martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
Locking the camera to the stars instead of the horizon changes everything.
It’s actually kind of terrifying to see the Earth spinning beneath us like this. 🌍🌌
martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
Češi o sobě rádi prohlašují, že jsou mistři světa v och*ávání daní🇨🇿🤷
Ve skutečnosti se daně obchází všude. Neexistuje totiž kreativnější tvor než podnikatel s daňovým formulářem v ruce. Ukážeme si ty nejvtipnější příklady.
Silvestrovský vlákno? Silvestrovský vlákno.🎆🧵
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martin havelka🇮🇹 retweeted
Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.
$30 per seat per month.
$1.4 million annually.
I called it "digital transformation."
The board loved that phrase.
They approved it in eleven minutes.
No one asked what it would actually do.
Including me.
I told everyone it would "10x productivity."
That's not a real number.
But it sounds like one.
HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.
I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."
They stopped asking.
Three months later I checked the usage reports.
47 people had opened it.
12 had used it more than once.
One of them was me.
I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.
It took 45 seconds.
Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.
But I called it a "pilot success."
Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.
The CFO asked about ROI.
I showed him a graph.
The graph went up and to the right.
It measured "AI enablement."
I made that metric up.
He nodded approvingly.
We're "AI-enabled" now.
I don't know what that means.
But it's in our investor deck.
A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.
I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."
He asked what that meant.
I said "compliance."
He asked which compliance.
I said "all of them."
He looked skeptical.
I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."
He stopped asking questions.
Microsoft sent a case study team.
They wanted to feature us as a success story.
I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."
I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.
They didn't verify it.
They never do.
Now we're on Microsoft's website.
"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."
The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.
He got 3,000 likes.
He's never used Copilot.
None of the executives have.
We have an exemption.
"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."
I wrote that policy.
The licenses renew next month.
I'm requesting an expansion.
5,000 more seats.
We haven't used the first 4,000.
But this time we'll "drive adoption."
Adoption means mandatory training.
Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.
But completion will be tracked.
Completion is a metric.
Metrics go in dashboards.
Dashboards go in board presentations.
Board presentations get me promoted.
I'll be SVP by Q3.
I still don't know what Copilot does.
But I know what it's for.
It's for showing we're "investing in AI."
Investment means spending.
Spending means commitment.
Commitment means we're serious about the future.
The future is whatever I say it is.
As long as the graph goes up and to the right.